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Along Came Bialy
Nathan Lane, Madeleine Doherty, Jennifer Smith, Kathy Fitzgerald, Matthew Broderick, Brad Oscar, Cady Huffman, Gary Beach, Roger Bart & Ensemble
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The time has come
To be a lover from the Argentine
To slick my hair down with Brilliantine
And gargly heavily with Lister... ine
Wow!
It's time for Max
To put his backers on their backs
And thrill them with amazing acts
Those aging nymphomaniacs
Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah!
Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah!
They were helpless
They were hopeless
Then along came Bialy!
They were joyless
They were boyless
Then along came Bialy!
They're my angels
I'm their devil
And I keep those embers aglow
When I wooz 'em
I can't lose 'em
Cause I cast my spell 'n'
They start yellin'
"Fire down below!"
They were listing
They were sinking
Then along came Bialy!
They were desperate
They were drinking
Then along came Bialy!
So romantic
They were frantic
Then their prayers were heard up above!
Heaven sent them
Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah!
Their Bialy!
Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah!
I'm the celebration of love! (He's the celebration of love!)
We were helpless
We were hopeless
Then along came Bialy!
Ah!
Life had passed us by
And love had stolen away
At the end of our rope
We'd given up hope
Of one last roll in the hay
Discarded dolls
Abandoned wrecks
Condemned to a life
Of sitting and knitting
When all we really wanted was... sex!
Ah, did you bring the checkee, my little turtledove?
Yes, but first, Bialy, can we please play one dirty little game?
Here in broad daylight?
It'll just be a quickie
Okay, what, what?
Let's play the Distracted Tourist and the Ever-Watchful Orangutan!
Oy, are you trying to kill me? Please, I'm exhausted!
Let's play one game where there's absolutely no sex!
What?
How about the Jewish princess, and her husband?
So romantic
We were frantic
Then our prayers were heard up above!
Heaven sent us
Our Bialy!
He's the celebration of love!
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Fire down below!
We were listing
We were sinking
Then along came Bialy!
We were desp'rate
We were drinking
Then along came Bialy!
So romantic
We were frantic
Then our prayers were heard up above!
It's Bialy!
Hail, Bialy!
He's the culmination
The restoration
The consummation
The titillation
Ejaculation
He's the celebration of love!
Bloom! Bloom!
What, Max, what?
I've done it! I've done it! Look, we got all the money!
Now all we have to do it put on the biggest flop in history!
That's great!
We can do it, we can do it
We can make a million bucks!
Bialystock and Bloom, Bialystock and Bloom!
The show's a go!
He raised the money, we're on our way
Keep it gay, keep it gay, keep it gay (Then along came Bialy!) (We can do it!)
We have our backing, oh, what a day (We can do it! We can do it)
We can make a million bucks! (Keep it gay, keep it gay, keep it gay) (Then along came Bialy!)
Wonder of wonders, we have all our cash (Everything we've ever wanted) (Bialystock and Bloom!)
Barring all blunders, we should have a smash! (Is set to come our way) (And Bloom!)
Deutschland, Deutschland, uber alles (It's Bialy! Hail Bialy!)
Alles in der welt!
Gay, gay, gay, gay!
Deutschland, Deutschland, uber alles (We can make it, we won't fake it) (Gay, gay, gay, gay!)
Gay, gay, gay, gay! (Bialystock and Bloom!) (Alles in der welt!)
Bialystock and Bloom
Bialystock and Bloom
Bialystock and Bloom!
Ah-ah, ah-ah-ah, ah-ah-ah-ah!
Ah-ah, ah-ah-ah, ah-ah!
We can do it
They can do it
Say goodbye to woe and gloom
We can do it
Nothing to it
Can't you hear that bing-bang-boom!
With their brilliance
Their resilience
Up together they will zoom!
We can't miss!
They were fated to be mated
They're Bialystock and Bloom! (We're Bialystock and Bloom!)
Ah!
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