Influenza
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My girlfriend caught a fever: she had nasty, sweaty hair
She had shivers, she had sneezes - now she's in intensive care
And I read all the books, I know the horrors it unleashes
A disease God meant for pigs has crossed the barrier of species
The virologist have studied her; they've done what they must do
The nurses all are weeping: they can't believe it's true
But the doctors shake their heads
And to the churchyard we must send her
For man-flu (man, man, flu) has crossed the barrier of gender
And is this my revenge for all the love you did withold?
You said "Oh stop complaining; it's just a silly cold"
No - you should have made me chicken soup and tucked me into bed
But now you know how ill I really was because you're dead
The boys of under two are now routinely vaccinated
The vaccine is no use now that the virus has mutated
It's realigned it's target from XY to double-X
For man-flu (man, man, flu) has crossed the barrier-
Now womankind is fading fast: they don't have long to live
But their husbands think they're faking it - no sympathy they give
The disease will pull then under, and soon their lungs will fail
The government won't intervene (because they're mostly male)
We're heading for extinction - we cannot procreate
And its a pity we'll no longer get to lie about your weight
The female of the species, to death she must surrender
For man-flu, man-flu, man-flu (man, man, man, man, flu)
Has crossed the barrier of gender