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I Understand
George Gaynes
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Lyrics
Original
Translation
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When I was five my brother stole my lollipop
My lollipop stole he
But I didn't mutter, "Damn your hide"
He needed candy more than I
So instead of biting off his hand
I just said, "Goo, I understand"
When I was ten my mother trounced me with a mop
With a mop, "trounce" said she me
But I didn't mutter, "Damn your eyes"
I knew she needed exercise
So instead of joining a gypsy band
I just said, "Mom, I understand"
At thirty a man in a car ruthlessly ran me down
He ruthlessly downran me
But I didn't mutter, "Damn your spleen"
For a man's a man, but a car's a machine
So instead of stripping him of his land
I just said, "Jack, I understand"
Now I'm forty-five and I've met Claire, we're engaged to wed
Engaged to wed are we
But tonight I tell you, "Damn you, Claire
You played me evil and that's not fair"
So instead of remaining calm and bland
I hereby do not understand
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