The Only Reason We're Alive
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I wanna fall in Love at 85
Go on shuffleboard dates and dance to hip-hop from '95
Our song would be Staying Alive, but only for the message
Otherwise we'd keep away from disco, it's depressing
We'd rock matching tracksuits and rope gold chains
We'd look like Run DMC but in their old age
We'd take aerobics classes
And wear bifocal glasses
And eat at I-HOP
And when it comes to the bedroom?
Well, nothing much would happen in the bedroom, because were 85
But we would still be down to take a walk, or take a drive, or sit and talk, and have a drink
And watch the passers by, and ask each other why
And how, and who, and where, and when
And then we'd laugh and cry again
About the people we had been
And I would touch her withered skin and comment on how thin it is, to keep in something infinite
And she would smile sweet and blush then tell me that I think too much
She's right I think too much
It's always been a problem
But then again that's how I made my green like the goblin
When I was in my 20's I was eating Top Ramen
Counting up my pennys, saving up to go food shopping
But now I'm 85, and somehow I feel more alive
I turn my hearing aid up and bump Jurassic 5
I read the sports page while she peruses classifieds
We like antique stores, garage sales, and barter buys
We got the box set of Louie at a bargain price
We've watched it so much that we have the lines memorized
We sip on my Mai-Tai's and sunbath at public pools
We both have season theatre passes to the sacred fool
And when it comes to the bedroom
Well hopefully, every once in a while, I knock her boots into the floral patterns of our bedpost
Then hold her head close, like death isn't chasing us
Planning on erasing us and replacing us, with better versions of us
Re-shaping us, re-making us, then re-creating us, with new identities so we can make new memories
Hush, little baby
Learn to walk, and talk, and feel, and lie, and think, and fight, and fuck, and die, and never get the answers why
She dips a joint of grass in wheatgrass and we get high
Her hair is silver as the moon in the Miami sky
We still pop pills
But it's not the Xanex anymore
Whenever we can't sleep we listen to the ocean floor
She got a Sound of the Sea CD for me from the Brookstone store
And ever since I've been snoring like a...
What's that word?
Oh, a buzz saw
Sorry, I go blank sometimes
But hey I'm 85
I'm not complaining, I'm just happy that I'm still alive
And happy that I have my better half by my side
Super fly
She doesn't look a day over 65
When I first saw her, I was totally in awe
She was classical, so I was like Yo-Yo Ma
And that was all it took, a single look and I was shook
I fell for her like some loose shingles from a Spanish roof
And I'ma Love her till she loses every last root
And has to glue dentures to her gums to chew solid food
Oooo
The only reason that we are alive
And none of us should have to wait until we're 85