Hug My Bloodstream
The Convincing Actor
Popularity ยท Low
YouTube
Searching YouTube...
Lyrics
Hug my bloodstream
Slow my ennui from cranking repeat
My girl got abused by an interesting man
And now I'll never find anything interesting again
Open my eye beams
Cut the light like a deli to cheese
The core of the orange was wilted and gray
When in the living room you said you'd keep my troubles at bay
But if I told you I felt like it was too late would you know it couldn't wait
Would you see that women are often left behind in this space
He's charismatic, he's a good leader, well I'm a good leader too
And I may love you but what's holding me back is being beholden to you
Hug my bloodstream
I was taught pain this harsh would be brief
But when a friend's trust has naught to do with your merits
You pay with your sleep for a daytime to bear it
Hold your home team
Hold her whole like the cliffs their ravine
You want me all worldly and looking my best
But I'm barely lifting my arms to get dressed
And if I told you I saw him in my nightmares would you vocally support me
Or stand with him on some precedent of human complexity
But aren't I complex too, did that ever occur to you
If you know that we're equals than why does your mind even have such a backseat
Hug my cumrag
Hold the sheet that I have used for three months
I hope to breathe in mud, I don't hope for bedbugs
I don't hope for shitstains, I do want your good love
Hold your homegirl
I hope I'm not being too wonky
But I am so terrified, that due to the binary
I'm gonna be left out of my own obituary
And if officials didn't know my name would you get it to my grave
If a memory's what I become would your brain be a safer space
Or would you bend me as I broke alive so the truth would hurt you less
That the position that you put me in is inextricable from my death
Back in Brighton
Me and some friends went to a club
The band was too poppy, but we had fun anyway
We let just the body excite and expound away
Some guy saw me
Saw my body and he didn't like it much
I can still feel his invasive touch
And to this very day I still feel like I made it up
Now what does that say about you and my confidence in you
That in figuring you'll do nothing my mind erases what it knew
And represses and reproaches little moments and accepts
That a woman's a leftover even to the fucking left
Hug my blessing
Test it out like a lake's warm edge
I want you to feel me, I want you to hear me
I'm all done pretending it makes sense to fear me
Fear yourself
Don't put that burden on somebody else
Lie awake in bed like I had to do for you
Like a bubble yet to rise to the surface of a stew
I remember watching one of my best friends like a sibling turned to husk
Every day their look more sunken and their tone bereft and hushed
With their access to the music in their chest cut off by fear
The pain I felt while loving them then will never disappear
I hug that friendship
Take a break from you and all of your shit
I know that I trust them and in times when I don't
I can see in the future the moment I will again
When everything's still again, when nothing is willed
And the water is flowing and loved in its spill
I hug that friendship, I hold to stay sane
The clearest of glass in a mysterious pane
'Cuz what am I to do, when I can't accrue anymore experiences
To combat the solipsism that is holding me in
I'm catting in the heat, wafting at the peat, unable to get out my head
God I wish I were dead, I can't find what a friend is anymore
Hug my bloodstream
Hug my bloodstream