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When No One Is Watching
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I wanna smash my face against the wall for even thinking 'bout it
It's not me and I know, so just forget about it
Just let me understand why
I'm having thoughts that I ain't had before
I need to know before it's too late
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So let me dwell in the madness
That's in my head and put an end to the bastard
Just give me one more day
And I swear I'll never think like this again
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I promise I'm not lying, I'm trying my hardest
I promise I'm not lying, I'm trying my hardest
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Am I? (Am I?)
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I wanna smash my face against the wall for even thinking 'bout it
It's not me and I know, but when I'm gone they won't even notice
There's only so many times that I can fake a smile
That I can fake a smile
But when I choose to show face
They reply "man, it's been awhile"
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(Man, it's been awhile)
(It's been awhile)
How can I control the thoughts in my head
When I can't even face the day on my own?
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It's fucking hard to exist
Was there something I messed up, something I missed?
'Cause I'm telling you man, these thoughts have taken over me
Make me see, make me breathe
Make me live, make me live
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I've forgotten how to be happy
It's not that I don't remember
It's just not something I can find
'Cause I don't know what's happened
The best I can do is show face and fake a smile
It's too fucking hard to exist
Everything is against me and I feel so guilty for feeling this way
Maybe it's for the best, I pushed everyone away
Maybe it's for the best, maybe it's for the best
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And so, the real answer is I don't wanna be here anymore
I've pushed everyone away that I love
Maybe it's for the best that I go, that I-
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