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Letter to John Clellon Holmes

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And then suddenly I'm standing by The side of the road at Santa Barbara Cursing the motorists of America who Really are not giving rides anymore About to give up, but standing just about Where I can see the hind end of the yard tracks Where if they make up a Frisco-bound freight Train, I'll see the bloody caboose tagged on Cursing, angry, supposedly I guess, or Something blackly handsome in like an Alan Ladd This gun for hire with murder, anger, screech Stops this brand new 1955 Mercury Montclair Persimmon color, brand new paint simonized Job with blonde, beautiful blonde In strapless white bathing suit at wheel and Wearing little thin gold bracelet at sweet anklet I run, jump in, she yawns, keeps yawning, wants to know if I can drive Yes, I can drive, I'm bloody well afraid to look at her The curl of her milk armpits, the flesh of her cream legs The cream legs, curls, love, milk, wow, did I love that Not looking but giggling Hearing she has been driving all the Way from Fort Worth, Texas without sleep I say, "Oh, how would you like some Mexican Benzedrine?" Which I have in big battered pack that I've been Sleeping on beach in cold night of sea fog coast with "Crazy!" she yells, I whip out my Benzedrine Yanking out all my dirty underwear And unspeakable Mexican raggedy junks and give her She takes two very much, we stop at Coke station and she mumps out jumping The sweetest little perfect everything, you know We swallow Benny's, by the time we've raised a hundred miles an hour And once maybe a hundred ten to Santa Ana in the Guadalupe Valley She's high, I'm high, we're talking and Loving, talking, driving and sweating And I can smell her sweet sweat and my own too And we move on up to the San Luis Obispo bump In the impossibly beautiful California dry blue sky sundowns And she calls her daddy in San Fran to cable her money She can pick up in Salinas