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But Thats The Whole Fucking Problem
Blood Girl
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Lyrics
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Guess who broke their streak after nine pathetic weeks?
Guess I'm not as okay as I thought that I could be
I didn't choose this life, but it chose me
So tell me why is it my responsibility?
I still do things I'm not allowed to do
Like hit myself or take it out on you
I still cut my thighs now and then
I forget to take my medicine
Lately I can't convince myself that I'm good deep down
Nothing surprises me anymore in my behavior as a monster
Nothing hurts me like the way that I hurt you
And if I killed myself, would I hurt you more?
Would you rather I was here this fucked up?
Always messing up you, always messing up me too
I didn't want this, I hope you know that I did not
Do you know that I am sadder right now
Than I ever, ever thought that I would be?
Who knew me before this shit?
Or has it always been like this?
The way I cut myself is a thing that I fucked up
'Cause I like you, but that's the whole fucking problem
'Cause I don't know how to treat people I love, so
I don't want to keep on loving you
'Cause it's hurting me and also hurting you too
'Cause I can feel you slipping away
I can feel you slipping away
Why is it like this?
It is hurting me, which is hurting you
Which is what I, what I always do
Always fucking up somehow
I just wish that loving was not so fucking tough
But nothing is, and that's why it's unfair
'Cause I love you so, so, so much
And I am sorry that I love you
I am, I am
I'm sorry that I can't make you understand
You can't read my mind and I can't read yours
Which should be alright, but it's hard, of course
Nothing ever is easy with me
But I'm sorry either way
Mm-mm-mm
Either way
Mm-mm-mm