Everything Happens to Me
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Lyrics
I make a date for golf, and you can bet your life it rains
I try to keep a party, and the guy upstairs complains
I guess I'll go through life just catching colds and missing trains
Everything happens to me
I never miss a thing, I've had measles and the mumps
And every time I play an ace, my partner always trumps
I guess I'm just a fool who never looks before she jumps
Everything happens to me
At first my heart thought you could break this jinx for me
That love would turn the trick to end despair
But now I just can't fool this head that thinks for me
I've mortgaged all my castles in the air
I've telegraphed and phoned, sent an airmail special too
Your answer was goodbye, and there was even postage too
I fell in love just once, and then it had to be with you
Everything happens to me
I try to sing a song, then the conversation flows
So I sing a little stronger, then the cocktail mixer goes
And then to top it off, somebody has to blow his nose
Everything happens to me
So then I make a movie, though it's little claim to fame
The part was very tiny, didn't even see my name
But I clicked my scenes off perfectly, and the cutter did the same
Everything happens to me
And when the room is loaded with celebrities
Magazine photographers come in
They're busy filming all those festivities
While here I sit with gravy on my chin
So then I write a song, that the publishers avoid
But the record company take a chance, so I am overjoyed
But the radio won't play it, so now I'm quite annoyed
Everything happens to me
Everything happens to me