28 Hours / Wherever We Are

Jenn Colella & [theatre]

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When you include the original flight We were on the plane for probably 12, 13 hours We were on there 15 hours 20 hours, 28 hours We were on the plane for over an entire day 28 hours Over an entire day There was one aisle in the middle Everyone knew every inch of that plane We were allowed out of our seats, but not off the plane You never think about it But airplane doors are 20 feet in the air And even if you survived the jump, they probably would have shot you You can go up to first class, you can stretch in the aisles There are three seats on each side, and There was only one aisle in the middle Everyone knew every inch of that plane Our flight was full! There were children sleeping on the floor We had no way to get information This is before most people had mobile phones And only a couple of people got through Hello? Mom! Bonjour? Operator? Tom? Oh, thank God! I finally got through I borrowed a passenger's phone How are you? Are the kids okay? No, I'm fine, Tom I'm fine Safe and sound on the ground here in Newfoundland We don't know much, except for the BBC Listen I can't talk long Can you do something for me? I'm okay I'm fine Vais bien Pick up! Tell the kids I'm alright Take them into the kitchen And show them the map That we used to put pins in For each destination That we flew together Tell them that I'm fine Put a pin here in Gander On our plane, someone has a cellphone But then the battery dies There are phones in the backs of the seats But they don't work! Half of the passengers on our plane don't speak English! Even if we knew what was happening, we don't speak their language On our plane, we asked the flight attendants But the captain says not to say too much And that's when rumors start flying There was an accident An accident? The US airspace is closed For the first time in history Why won't she tell us what's happening? A helicopter crashed in Pennsylvania A helicopter crashed into a building We need to do something It's World War III! Oh, my God! It's World War III! Meanwhile, on our plane We didn't have a clue We were all going insane because There wasn't squat to do Then the captain starts apologizing Says on behalf of the airline "I'm giving each and every one some Complimentary booze!" Open the airplane doors Wave at all the cars Hello to whoever you are Wherever we are The ground crews supplied whatever we needed Nicotine patches Medication Pampers Something to drink! So the flight attendants brought out All the mini-bottles of liquor And delivered them to everyone Soon everyone got friendlier I took a couple of pictures of the view there in my camera We didn't know where we were But we knew that we were hammered! Open the airplane doors Wave at all the locals Surely there's something better to do than park Wherever we are We'd been sitting there for 14 hours When we pull out the Grey Goose Kevin and I were kinda hiding it because Because we didn't want to share it Anyway, this woman, this hot mess behind us, kept completely freaking out I don't understand why they can't let us off, I mean Just to stretch our legs, I mean, really? I need to get some air, oh, my God, I need to get off this plane! And my boyfriend Kevin, we're both named Kevin It was cute for a while anyway, Kevin was not dealing with it well I'm going to kill her Excuse me, I would like to get off the plane, I am claustrophobic! Excuse me, would you like some Xanax? Because you are freaking out and it is Freaking me out, and we are all freaking the fuck out! Open the airplane doors Let a little air in here 'Cause I could use a shower or a bar (or a bar!) Open the airplane doors Look at all the planes out there There must be a convention, it's bizarre Wherever we are 28 hours (28 hours) Out of the window 28 hours (28 hours) Nothing but darkness 28 hours (28 hours) Darkness and headlights 28 hours (28 hours) Nothing to see The flight attendants keep telling us nothing's wrong When I've got kids, and I've got grandkids I know when someone's hiding something And when parents need their kids to stop Asking questions, they start playing movies We ran through every movie we had Legally Blonde, Doctor Dolittle 2, and Titanic Near, far, wherever you- Nothing to do, nothing to see Thank God we stopped at the duty-free Wherever we are Do you mind if I sit? I need to get to work and there's some drunk people at The back of the plane singing at the top of their lungs No, of course, I'm Diane Nick, how are you doing? I'm worried about someone, he was flying today I just wish there was some way to tell him where I am Newfoundland, oh, no, you know that, you just can't tell him right I'm hoping you're one of those people who Laughs when English people say awkward things I just wish we knew what was happening What's happening? What's happening? Somewhere in between Your life And your work When the world may be falling apart And you think I'm alone I'm alone And I'm so damn helpless There's nothing left to do but drink We open the airplane doors Flash all the cars, whoo! I've never done that before 28 hours God! Over an entire day Running out of things to say And wondering if there's someone going to clue us in Tell us all what's happening Because the sun is setting And we're sitting in the dark Wherever we are Later that night, I'm up in the cockpit with some of the other Passengers when the pilot puts the radio on over the intercom And the whole plane goes silent when the president gives his speech "I ask the American people to join me in saying thanks for all the folks Who've been fighting hard to rescue our fellow citizens and to Join me in saying a prayer for the victims and their families The resolve of our great nation is being tested, but make no mistake We will show the world that we will pass this test God bless" You got through to the airline Tom, I'm okay Tell me what's happening out there How bad is it? Tom, tell me everything Tom, who was in the air? No, no, I wouldn't have known them No, no one on that airline Charles? Are you sure? No, I'm fine, Tom I'm fine