Time to Destination
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5236 miles
Outside air temperature: 66 Fahrenheit
5429 miles
36,127 feet high
5737 miles
Time to destination: exactly 2 hours
On my flight to Shanghai
And when I get there I'm lie
Down in my hotel room and not turn on CNN
Don't wanna hear about a guy named 'Weener'
sending pictures of his dick to a 15 year old kid
Don't wanna hear no more Trump trash talk
Or hear Hillary smearing Trump when
she's got her own freak for a husband
Bill Clinton had more ladies than Iron Mike
He even got blown by an intern in the Oval Office, right?
People sweep it under the rug because Bill's
smile's so peachy and his skin is snow white
Yeah, here we are 11 days until the election
And Hillary's now associated with a child predators erection
And Trump wants to build walls to keep out Mexicans
But illegal immigrants did a job for me and they did
it right and it passed the building code inspections
I've got nothing against people wanting to escape
poverty and running for safety in the land of the Americans
It's a very hard election, isn't it?
These two candidates are both walking,
talking, power-hungry steaming piles of white grits
It's a very hard election isn't it?
On November 8th the best we can hope for is a president
Who's either cocky and pompous and talks a lot of shit
Or one who's got the FBI high on their priority list
Who's at the back of her hubby who's the very definition of sexist Or
is even allegedly another word that
I won't say that also ends in '-ist'
People say, Mark why don't you write like you used to?
I say well, people, because it's no longer 1992
And San Fransisco wasn't being taken over by Silicon Valley tools
And music venues hosted musicians, fools
And now it's all about bookin' DJs, dudes
And those DJs are so badass
'Oh DJ, you're so cool'
Back then I made 200 bucks a week
Working at a hotel in Canada was the only foreign country
I'd ever been to and, man, what a treat
For anyone who's nuts about maple donuts
The game hockey and has a taste for Crappie or Walleye
Beautiful old church down the street on the corner
Has been demolished it's now a Google Tech headquarters
And I can no longer buy CDs at Borders
If there's music I'm interested in my girlfriend has to order it
From Amazon off the goddamn internet
And that transaction now makes it
into my songs and i know its pathetic
But I'm just calling it 'is that is what it is?'
Down the toilet went this music business
People say 'Mark, why don't you play Katy Song?'
Because she passed away, people,
and I don't sing that one to cellphones
Katy used to sarcastically call me 'Dark Mark'
She had a great sense of humour and a lust for life and a spark
And she would have supported my every creative decision
She understood growth and art and she understood me as a musician
Here I am in China at the orange hotel
Google is banned and so is Facebook they tell me
They don't even have CNN
And when you walk around the streets
it's like you died and went to heaven
And the orange is just sweet and this hotel is peaceful
This time off from the Hillary vs. Trump slugfest feels pretty swell
You don't know it until you cross the ocean for a spell
But I think the United States of America is going to hell
On a train from Shanghai to Beijing
Herpes breaking out on my leg for
the second time in the last two weeks
Show tonight then I'm flying off to Nashville
To play the rhyme and sing to a grand piano
But on my mind on my mind on my mind
Is my past and Christmas tree and my house out there on the snow line
Gonna settle down there this Christmas with my girlfriend and her cat
And hope that her cat finds that sneaky little rat
It snuck in when the new roof was being done
You fix something and another thing becomes undone
And it goes on and on and on and on
If you buy a house that was built in 1851
And I hope that on Christmas eve the snow falls
It's magic when that happens
And I'm gonna sleep like Lou Rawls after three consecutive world tours
Next year I'm gonna take some time off
Organise my affairs clean my chimney and get my hot tub going
Gonna let some time turn without my brothers and sisters
Gonna spend some time with my girl and her little baby with whiskers
Beijing to USA and I'm way up in the sky
With my stuffed panda bear and a book called 1775
China was beautiful and the fans they were so polite
But it was all a dream in the grand scheme of things
I'm flying home