Blues Song
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Lyrics
Well you can stand naked on the corner of Main Street, baby
And let everybody slow down and take a look
Or you can drive your Cadillac to the library, baby
And maybe read the last ten pages of an Agatha Christie book
You can feed my cat to my dog
And turn around and feed my dog to my horse
You can screw the whole damn royal family, baby
Until they all gotta get divorced
But baby, baby, baby, baby
Baby you can do anything you wanna do, baby
And I swear it will not bother me
'Cause baby you know
Baby you know you got to
You got to, you got to be what you're going to be
You can burn down the orphanage, baby
Over there on the poor side of town
You can go to the circus, baby
Frighten the elephants
See if you can get them to maybe trample a clown
You can steal the prize out of my box of cereal, baby
And replace it with a rat
Then you can walk up to someone who might be a little overweight
Be kind of sensitive about it and say
"Oh my God, you're really fat"
Live and let live, baby
That's the cornerstone
The very essence of my philosophy
And baby, baby you know
You know you got to
You got to, you got to be what you're going to be
I'm gonna play my harmonica
Since I charge thirty-five dollars a note
I'm not gonna play much of my harmonica
You see the blues
The blues isn't an art form
It's not a type of music
The blues is a product
Not unlike computer chips or tampons
The blues is a way for white kids to feel that they understand
The feelings of black people
Without ever actually having to meet any
The blues is all these things and more
Available for $19.95
Oh baby, baby you can do whatever you wanna do, baby
Baby you know it's not gonna bother me
'Cause baby you know
You know you gotta
You gotta be what you're going to be
Here comes the solo
Ooh, what a solo it is
You know, that might not be the blues
But it sure makes me sad
Listen, in the distance
The sound of Leadbelly rolling in his grave
I said it before, baby
I'll say it again
Live and let live
The very essence
The cornerstone
The summit of my philosophy
Baby, baby you know
Baby you know you gotta
You gotta be what you're going to be
A blues man needs a nickname
And everybody calls me Two Shoes
Because I always wear two shoes
I know it's not much of a nickname
But by the time I got around to getting my nickname
All the good ones had been taken
Take for example Blind Lemon Lipschitz
Blind Lemon Lipschitz gouged out his own eyes with his thumbnails
So he could be called Blind Lemon
It's true, don't laugh
He felt the very essence of the blues calling him from within
And he felt that contract too
Oh baby, baby you know
Baby you know you can do whatever you do
I don't care, I don't even care, baby
It's not gonna bother me
'Cause baby, baby, baby, baby, baby, baby, baby, baby
You gotta, you gotta, you gotta, you gotta
You gotta be, you gotta be what you're going to be