A Tight-Knit Family / Love Is Blind / The Thrill of First Love

Various Artists

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Lyrics

Well, the situation's this It's not tough to comprehend I divorced my wife I left my child And I ran off with a friend But I want a tight-knit family I want a group that harmonizes I want my wife, and kid, and friend To pretend the time will mend Our pain So I make them interact So I don't go by the book We all eat as one Wife, friend, and son And I sing out as I cook I want a tight-knit family I hope you all enjoy linguine Talk 'til you hear the dinner bell Such a dear clientele I swear We're gonna come through it I fear We'll probably fight But nothing's impossible Live by your wit Kid, wife, and lover Will have to admit I was right I cushioned the fall I want it all! I want it all! I want it! Sit down, my dear I hear you have a problem Im sure you're not disgusting or indiscreet Take a load off your feet Love is a mess So's my son, expressly to hurt me Marvin, my ex You've seen him for years Told me over the phone to tell you my fears Do you only treat queers? Breathe deep, my dear You'll find me understanding Your pain is a priori Unfold you untold story Now to break bread Loosen your glands Put your head in my hands I'm everything he wanted It's time I put it all together The date was set My father let my marry I married I Then Marvin came from work Sat me down on the bed He told me how he loved me How needed, that he valued me I have? Yes, syphilis He said (Good) I have (Yes?) Syphilis It's true (Good) I had something rotten Which appears that now it's well forgotten Maybe, darling Maybe, darling, so do you I am probably diseased You're a lovely girl And so easily appeased What a lovely girl Though you're probably diseased He took pills to not excite us He explains I'd hepatitis too Hepa, hepa, hepatitis, hepatitis, hepatitis Love is blind Love can tell a million stories Love's unkind Spiteful in a million ways Then I stayed home from work Took good care of my men They faked despair, they wet their bed, They combed their hair, they acted dead One said? (Yes?) Daddy is a prick (What?) He said? (Yes?) Daddy isn't mine (Good) He filled my coats With candies and notes With "Will you be my-- Will you be my valentine? (Valentine?") It's cathartic harder to believe You're a damaged girl I've a scalped up my sleeve What a damaged girl Do not ever slit your wrists I've missed him; he's still missing Don't make noise, but daddy's kissing Boys Petty, petty, petty, petty Love is blind Love can tell a million stories Love's unkind Spiteful in a million ways Love is blind Love can tell a million stories Love's unkind Spiteful in a million ways Love is crazy (Love) Love is often boring Love stinks (Love) Love is pretty often debris When you find (Love) What you find Then never, never, never, never, never (Love) Do it over again Love reads like a bad biography (Love) All the names are changed to protect the innocent (Love) Love is blind My name is Mendel I treat her husband I think she's very insecure But so am I I've never married Work Work is my passion Or perhaps that's my alibi I don't care to discuss it I think she's charming I think she's eager That's unprofessional and mean But still it's true His name is Mendel (Ah-ah) Return next Friday I admit I admire you Pick up all your clothes Whizzer begs Whizzer knows Shave your legs Make me sick You're a prick God you're impossible We've been together for nine months Ten months Nine months Ten months Nine months Ten months We are the salt of the bourgeoisie While I put the steak in I bring home the bacon And we're proud to say we love it how we Don't (Won't) Don't Won't Agree Everything he owns is vile Marvin doesn't care a whit Marvin doesn't share my devotion to Style Men from France can cancel a debt Men in cufflinks make me forget my name I intend to upset This regrettable game Whizzer takes me by the neck Isn't that a French lapel? Whizzer has unlimited knowledge of Dreck Send me flowers Mention is made Make them roses Attention is paid in full See how quickly he sours When he pushes, I pull Pick up your clothes, Marvin Breeding shows, Marvin I was rich He was horny We fit like a glove Close your eyes, Whizzer Passion dies But I'd kill for that thrill of first Love We ask for passion at all times We stand to passion and drink this toast Still it's awfully trying And we're not denying That of all the lesser passions We like fighting most Whizzer drinks too much to see What a joy is chastity What a joy is saving his joys For one man Leave me Love me Don't be a fool Want me Feed me No one's so cruel And cheap What I love I devour What you love you devour What I covet I keep Isn't that right, Whizzer? Let's both fight, Whizzer! I was trained in karate I'm best when I cheat So I'll cheat, Whizzer, and I'll shove And I'll kill for that thrill of first Love We've been together for nine months Ten months Nine months (Oh! When are you gonna get over-) Nine months Ten months In fact we've almost survived a year True, but who is counting? We're too busy mounting A display of our affection That is so sincere Passion dies Passion dies I would kill for that thrill of first love I would kill for that thrill of first love I would kill for that thrill of first love I would kill for that thrill of first love I would kill for that thrill of first Love Love Love