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Chinatown, Etc.
Harland Williams
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๐ฌ๐ง English ยท Original
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I love the Chinese language, man, oh my God
It's beautiful, the rhythm, the cadence, it's like a song, isn't it?
I'm up in Chinatown a few weeks ago in San Francisco, I'm in the middle of Chinatown
Everybody's speaking Chinese, and I'm thinking to myself, I don't speak Chinese
But I figure, if I try
I gotta be saying something, right?
So I'm in the middle of Chinatown, I'm like, "hong dai, dong doi, dang daye, dhog naye"
Some little kid ran up and gave me an egg salad sandwich
Got a free lunch
Daddy got a free lunch
Uh, so you're going to school, that's good, gotta know things
Sometimes, yeah
If a chick's wearing a thong, and she accidentally shits her pants
Does that cut it right in two?
Is that a double thunder loaf right there?
I'm just asking, I need to know, man
We all gotta have a sense of humor, some people don't have a sense of humor
You ever meet someone like that, huh? Won't laugh at anything no matter what?
I met someone recently, remember this guy was living up in a tree they were gonna cut down?
500-year-old tree, they're gonna cut it down, guy goes and lives in it
You think if you lived in a tree for seven months, you'd have a sense of humor, hello?
So here I am over at the mall the other day
I'm wandering around, who do I see? It's the tree guy
I recognized him from the news, thinking he's got to have a sense of humor
So here's what I did, I snuck up behind him
I just tip-toed right up between his little shoulder blades
And all I said was-
Oh, he started crying, he crapped his pants, he was wearing a thong
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