It's Been Awile

The speaker looks back on a long period of struggling with addiction, poor choices, and low self-esteem. At first, they describe feeling unable to stand independently or reach out to someone they care about. Being with that person seems to bring temporary relief, but the speaker later recognizes that their problems and repeated mistakes have not disappeared. The mood shifts between longing for comfort, regret, and a wish for peace.

Several expressions suggest how difficult the struggle feels. “Hold my head up high” means to feel proud or confident, while “stand on my own two feet” means to manage independently. The speaker says they have “stretched” themselves beyond their means, which implies taking on more than they can handle. Memories of candlelight and a loved one’s face, and of their taste, contrast with the speaker’s confusion and pain; these sensory details make the relationship feel vivid and intimate.

The song does not present love as a simple cure. The loved one may offer comfort, but the speaker still faces addiction and responsibility for their actions. Their admission that they cannot blame their father suggests a complicated effort to accept responsibility without denying that family relationships matter. The repeated phrase about time passing may express hope that things can change, but it also emphasizes how long the struggle has lasted.