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Abandoned 2
Kill Bill: The Rapper; RAV
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My penmanship slips, sloppy as all hell
Both feet dangle from the top of the guardrail
Streetfight stance, get up off of him, he guard well
Lost on the road, tryin' to find if his star fell
Heavy as barbell, his thoughts remained and dipped
Deep in construction, but he lost the manuscripts
Break through the skull, slide across the candle-lit floor
No tellin' what's in store for the boar
Life is a balancing act that I can't keep up
But I'm rollin' with the punches by rollin' a couple trees up, it slows me
The solution turns to problems
Momma told me keep my head out the clouds, I heard it often
Now I'm dead to the world, where my coffin?
Catch me sittin' by the gravity bong, you heard the coughin', time to sleep
Seems like it's all that I do
I say I'm down to the death, but I don't talk to my crew
Man I'm withdrawn, grippin' a big bong, a tall cup
I haven't even made it, people sayin' I'm washed up
Y'all got me fucked up... literally
It's puff puff to get to sleep, puff puff for energy
I fucked up, synergy lost, I'm depressed
Feel the world crumble 'round me, like it's all for the best
I don't fuck with you lames tryin' to talk and I'm stressed
I'm screamin' "Fuck the world," from the top of my chest
Kill Bill is JINZO and JINZO will kill Bill
He change when the wind blows, the windows are still filthy
Fog the vision, the 5-7 split, that's a long division
Cuttin' it back just means
Longer spliff ends, dead to the medicine
I've fallin' victim to my own evil deeds
I'm just sittin' in the static of my old frequencies
I ask the voices when they'll stop, they all answer, "Forfeit!"
Exploring this torment and dormancy, it's morbid
Every one of my demons is now currently in orbit
My every fear mocks me, it murders me to live
In the living room of a dying world that I rage war with
But I refuse to die in the world that I was born in
Seeking peace of mind, but my mind pieces torture
My existence and I'm trying to resist it, but it's boring
I've seen through their pattern: first they laugh, then run from me
It's like I'm tryin' to sell cigarettes to these tobacco companies
But why do I insist to make them happy when I know not?
Of happiness myself, sitting trapped within my shell
If that act alone don't seem backwards in itself
Then consider all my vices that keep damaging my health
It seems that I'll never reach the bandage on the shelf
And it's not that I can't reach it, I just haven't got the will
So what's the point, then?
Why seek a partner, a house, or employment?
If you don't ever experience enjoyment
Then all the time you spend just gets flushed down the toilet
Well, or at least that's just how I see things
Don't find joy in pricey things: clothes, cars, diamond rings
Y'all keep saying that I think so dark, enlighten me
Every expectation is just so large, it frightens me
Tired of this planet, but no star's inviting me
You tell me to speak up, but when I open up, you hide from me
You're all happy or just all trying to lie to me
And so my dark thought refinery's still functionin'
Tryin' to punch through the walls cause I hope
To discover lots of cameras, "Rav this was a hoax!"
This was all a ruse to raise your wrath, really
Now you can live happily, but the fact actually is...
I'm still livin' on a planet
Where my self interests don't matter
Where my selfishness won't vanish
I'm still abandoned
Still livin' on a planet
Where my self interests don't matter
Where my selfishness won't vanish
I'm still abandoned
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