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Killin' me

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Don't ask me how I feel, I feel however the drugs feel I just get high until it feels like we in love still But then I notice, I'm alone and this a buzzkill And I don't trust myself 'cause nobody that I trust will I still remember when we first met You told me you might be the girl that leave me hurt next We laughed about it But what's so wild about your smile is I ain't seen it in a while and now I can't laugh without it You were the only bright spot on all my dark days Lost my rock, now I reside in a hard place Ride or die it's all fake I realised that you lost faith Way before you called Like I'm decided the park ways I should have saw the signs I hope that nigga that you dating know you always mine And what we have was amazing, just at an awful time Don't tell me that you moved on, if I ain't off your mind And time heals wounds, I hope it heals mine soon 'Cause everyday doing nothing what I feel like doing Trapped inside of a room, can't nobody get to 'em Scared to meeting new people and fearing how they gon' do 'em Girl I'm uninterested, in pretending like we're friends and shit We used to be different, the difference is all of our differences I know you sick of my binging and my addictedness Just thought you be more empathetic towards my emptiness Girl I miss you like I miss my granny Shit, I don't know who I miss more How come everything I take for granted Is everything that I wish for Maybe I'll never understand it Maybe I could've did more All that shit that's killin' me Give me that feeling that I live for You take my name of another nigga that loved you fresh out the bed You missed my calls, I text his dad and you really left them on read, the bloodshead I forgave you, but can't forget I don't hate you, I hate the stress I just hate the way that you dead And I hate to make you upset But in case we just can't connect And I'm changing, just has you claiming Ain't no shame, I change for the best All that shit that's killin' me