A Fine Romance
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A fine romance with no kisses
A fine romance, my friend, this is
We should be like a couple of hot tomatoes
But you're as cold as yesterday's mashed potatoes
A fine romance, you won't wrestle
A fine romance, you won't nestle
I might as well play bridge with my old maid aunts
I haven't got a chance
Ain't this a fine romance?
A fine romance, my good fellow
You take romance, I'll take Jell-O
We two should be like clams in a dish of chowder
But we just fizz like parts of a Sedlet's powder
A fine romance with no clinches
A fine romance with no pinches
You're just as hard to land as the Ile de France
I haven't got a chance
This is a fine romance
A fine romance with no quarrels
With no insults and all morals
You've never mussed the crease in my blue serge pants
I never get the chance
This is a fine romance