Trying
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Lyrics
Trying is just a slippery slope to sadness
Which is a slippery slope to madness
Which is a hollywood word for how I exist and work I guess
And love is just another word for obnoxious
Which is to say I am loveless
Maybe that's why I am scared of you and what you do
You like me enough to make me feel like I'm good
When you love me I think maybe I could love too
I always thought I might be bad now I know that it's true
Cus I think you're so good and I'm nothing like you
And you took me apart like a ball jointed doll
Put a heart where I used to be just ribs with a skull
Now I hurt when you leave is that better than before
Now I just want you to love me more and more and more and more
And more and more and more and more and more and more and more
Kill me use me for what is my purpose
Choke me until I turn purple
Instead of your mild and self sacrificing humanising
My love is closer to something that's toxic
Than love that is just something lovely
Which is why I don't kiss cus I can taste myself on them
Can you love me again if I'm a horrible friend?
If I push you away to make more room for myself?
If I'm broken and hurting and stuck in a loop?
Always saying the same things embarrassing you?
Can you break me until I am broken enough
To pathetically think that I understand love
It's all a mental decoy I'm a broken toy
Mistaking attention for joy
Bleeding is maybe something to do with competing
Just a proof that our bodies are fleeting
Living life to the fullest has always been the weirdest thing
And love has always caused nothing but problems
If you see my exes please tell them
That pain is a virtue still nothing really quite compares
To how you sometimes dye my hair
And love me even when I'm sick I know I don't deserve it
Trying is just a slippery slope to surviving
And that's why I'm writing and writing
Never quite finishing any songs so I write more and more and more
And more and more and more and more and more and more and more
And more and more and more and more and more and more and more
And more and more and more and more and more and more and more
And more