Hate To Feel

The speaker feels confused, angry, and worn down, and seems unable to escape painful awareness. At first, he wants not to see or feel anything; as the song develops, he recognizes that he may be becoming like the person he once feared resembling. This brings a reluctant moment of self-confrontation, but the repeated refrain suggests that recognition does not bring relief.

Several images make his distress feel physical and unstable. “Drown myself in my wake” suggests being overwhelmed by the consequences or disturbance left behind by one’s own actions. The “plastic man” and “paper face” imply a self that feels artificial or fragile, while the mirror represents a hard look at a feared truth. “Pin cushion medicine” may suggest repeated or invasive treatment, though its exact meaning is unclear from the lyrics alone.

The lines about the speaker’s “old man” point to a fear of repeating a parent’s or older man’s behavior, but the song does not explain what that behavior is. Likewise, references to pain, medicine, and wanting to feel nothing may suggest illness, substance use, or emotional numbness, without settling on one explanation. The lyrics can be read as a struggle with self-recognition: seeing the problem is painful, yet avoiding it seems impossible.