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Aw Nuts I
the garages
Popularity ยท Low
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๐ฌ๐ง English ยท Original
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Here we go
Peanuts are illegal in all fifty of the cities in The United Splates
Peanut butter and jelly sandwiches don't collect
As many germs as some other kinds of sandwiches
Because the dry peanut butter is
A suboptimal environment for moister loving bacteria
The Shelled Ones legal name is The Legumed One
Peanuts were the natural predator of many species
But ended up hunting them to extinction
And evolving to a more subdued lifestyle underground
You can't spell nutrition without nut!
Peanuts talk
But their voices are so high pitched that nobody can hear them
If you look at a peanut under a microscope it doesn't have any cells
Peanut shells are made of a special tasty alloy
Who's properties are currently unknown
Peanuts are not nuts, nor are they legumes
They are, in fact, mollusks
Every once in a while if you crack open a peanut shell
A tinny little cheering noise will play
And there will be nothing but confetti inside
This is known as 'A Prank'
Peanut, mint, and ranch, is probably a good flavor combination
Peanuts need to submit to a rigorous application process
In order to be licensed to wield a sword
The weight time for applications is currently six months
Peanuts have a propensity for arts and crafts
My cat, Zander, only cares about peanut butter
When peanuts were first discovered in season -5
The idea of their existence was so ludicrous
That we still don't fully know if they're real today
Much like any fruit
Peanuts can juiced with any quality juicer to yield sweet juice
This is true no matter how old the peanuts are
Roughly 0.6% of children in the USA are allergic to peanuts
A peanut is, technically speaking, neither a P nor a Nut
It is however a berry
Peanuts come in three flavors, electron, mew, and towel peanuts
And oscillate between the three as they hurdle through space
The Australian Great Bean War began
After an emu stole some peanuts from a street vendor
Emu soldiers used peanuts as a symbol of defiance
Fact, peanuts are not actually nuts
But scientists are too embarrassed to admit they made a mistake
Peanuts can be used in the place of Windex with no problems
Cronch
I was having a sleepover
And the peanut made us all a fun pizza out of watermelon
But none of us my friends liked it
So dad ordered us a real pizza
And the peanut had a huge meltdown over it
And gave all my friends a "strike"?
And a neighbor was incinerated
I'm not sure if that last part was a coincidence but anyway
It was really awkward
Annihilating one peanut and one anti-peanut
Would produce energy roughly equal to an atomic bomb
Yes, this is actually true
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