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Woe Is Me
The 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee Cast
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Lyrics
Original
Translation
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I'd just like to take one moment to thank my two fathers,
Who've been so supportive of me in all of my endeavors
Thanks, dads!
We hate losers (No one likes a loser)
Which is why we discipline
God hates losers...
(But He loves you)
...because losers do not know how to
Win
And we have faith in you, honey
Yes, we do, yes, we do
Go get 'em!
I hope you can love me, America
I'm gunning for first prize!
Here's why you should love me, America
My needs I cannot overemphasize
I make myself crazy
Being what my dads hope I'll be
But what about me dads?
What about me?
Jesus Christ!
What about me?
Practice your breathing, Logainne
Though I practice yoga, I don't breathe
I try not to disappoint
But still I
Disappoint the dads who my friends mock
Kids are mean
Kids'll talk
All my so-called friends roll their eyes
They're incredibly petty
Because my dads are my dads and alright enough already!
Woe is me
Woe is me
Which is why I gotta win this spelling bee
Take a picture for her BM
Don't call her BM, Carl! (Dad!)
Sorry, her birthmother
Peggy Jenkins!
Who'd be very proud if she could see you spell!
My birthmother lives in Kansas, MO
In a trailer, in a park.
Tornadoes
Every now and then she sends a card:
"Life, and men" she writes, "are hard"
She would like to meet me when I'm grown and I burst like a comet!
But I'm so stressed by my stress, I just wanna up and vomit
Woe is me
Woe is me
Which is why I gotta win this spelling-
Be smart, be cool, be an adult
Be remarkably adroit in social situations
Woe is me (Be smart, be cool, be smart, be cool)
Woe is me (Be smart, be cool, be smart, be)
Why is why I gotta win this
(Which is why she's gotta win this)
Spelling
Bee!
Bee!
Bee!
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