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Be‐bop Tango (Of Old Jazzmen’s Church)
Frank Zappa
Popularity · Moderate
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🇬🇧 English · Original
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Raw, unbridled passion
Now, ladies and gentlemen, as you might have noticed
Bruce Fowler has just attempted to complete a genuine be-bop inspired tango trombone solo
But Bruce, aside from being a fantastic person who blows on an instrument that goes in and out
Has also worked up a dance that goes with this tango
Bring the band on down behind me, boys
Feet on fire
Good God, ain't it funky now
Okay?
Now, Bruce is, limbering up the important muscles of the body that will be required for this part of our tango
His lovely assistant Napoleon will, ah, will work with him in the first part of this dance
Now, to accompany what they are going to do with their feet
George is going to take the melody of the tango
Paraphrase it, play it and sing it at the same time
Okay
Are you ready?
Give it a whirl
Jazz (jazz)
Yeah, man
Cool
Ya dig?
Stand by the strobe lights
This is the be-bop
Even if you think it doesn't sound like that
It sort of sounds like be-bop
Now wait a minute
Give them another chance
Give them one more chance, George
You don't want to throw them off
Give 'em another chance, George
One more time, get in
Yeah
This is the be-bop even though you think it doesn't sound like that
It's sounding a little bit more like be-bop every
Look, look, c'mere you guys
Bruce, Napoleon, come over here
Seriously now
I mean, you know about jazz, you know how...
When it's really good, you know, you have to play with your back to the audience and everything
Okay
Alright
Really deep and sensitive, you know, and with a lot of notes that are not in the key, okay?
Or even in the room
Okay
The next step is we are going to attempt to have
Hey, right over here
Into the area formerly occupied by Bruce and Napoleon
Alright, now be very careful of these wires
Napoleon, I think it would be best if you moved all of your delicate equipment
Just, because you just don't know what sort of unbelievable energy will be released once we get into this part of the song
Really
It's almost too sick to imagine
Okay, here's the idea
There, there is a beat going on like this
This is a regular, pedestrian sort of a beat, you know?
Something
Alright
The challenge of this event, and this goes for Joni Mitchell too, is the fact that...
Oh, my God
Wait 'til they have that on television
The challenge of this event is for our lovely contestants to move their body not to the beat that's going like this
But to link their minds with the mind of George Duke
Link the... link the important muscles of their very own bodies with the muscles of George's fingers as he makes 'em go up and down the keyboard
Connecting his vocal cords to his finger muscles (that's right, honey)
Which are connected by a mysterious cosmic link to your mind and your body
And you will dance to whatever George sings
Do you think you can do it?
Give 'em a test, George
Okay, you're a little slow, Carl
A little slow, Carl
Brenda, you're not even in the running
Okay?
Do it, I'll show you
Make me dance, George
Okay, now look
You've gotta link up with, link up with big George
Okay? You know what I'm talkin' about, don't ya, Brenda?
Of course you do
Good God
Alright
Make them dance, George
It's entirely too adagio
It has to be more frenetic, ya know, more, ya know, like...
Much better
Can we have a couple of people from the audience to come up here and match wits with our...
A young gentleman has presented himself for this scientific experiment
Do we have a succulent young lady who will accompany him?
Ah, come on
What's your name?
Rudy Ann Taynee
What?
What was that again?
Uh, my name's Todd
Uh-huh? Okay. Todd
Todd. Okay
Alright, now wait, just a moment, we have to...
Hey, there is a customer right there
It's almost too much for the human mind to bear
Quaaludes, ladies and gentlemen
What's your name?
Lana
Lana, hey
Alright, now we'll have to set this up just like it was in grammar school on the playground yard
Uh, you two guys work that area
You two guys, uh, Lana, you take the outside facing Carl
Thanks, Carl. Okay?
Okay? You ready?
Give it to 'em, George, and no mercy
Carl, you keep grabbing her, Carl
No, faster, faster
Now, you're sitting there, and you're saying to yourselves, "I could do that"
And of course, you can
And now's your chance to join in our, ah, Hollywood be-bop experiment
All you have to do is stand up
Don't be shy
Just stand up
That's it
Just stand up
You are standing up, up, up
Each and every one of you is standing up
He is standing up, I know he is
Okay
Alright
Now, I won't press the issue, some of you are too reserved for this, and may the Lord have mercy on you
But the ones who are standing up, when George plays his hot licks, twitch it, and have a good time, you ready?
A religious experience, right here in the Roxy, ladies and gentlemen
Folks, I'd like to thank you very much for, ah, participating in that
It's good for you, really
I think I'm gonna play "Green Onions"
Just keep playin' it
Thank you very much for coming to the concert tonight
Bruce Fowler on trombone
Napoleon Murphy Brock on tenor sax
Ruth Underwood on percussion
Ralph Humphrey on drums
Chester Thompson on drums
Tom Fowler on bass
George Duke on keyboards
Marty Perellis on smoke machine
Thank you