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All The Men In My Life Keep Getting Killed By Candarian Demons
Renée Klapmeyer, Ryan Ward, Darryl Winslow
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🇬🇧 English · Original
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All the men in my life
Keep getting killed by Candarian demons
All the men in your life keep getting killed by Candarian demons?
First there was Ed
A really nice guy
Didn't talk too much, but I didn't mind
I was all set
To marry him
But before we could consummate, Ed was killed by
A Candarian demon (Candarian demon, Candarian demon, Candarian demon)
Then it was Daddy (Daddy)
Who I could count on (aa-oo)
He loved to read the Necronomicon (Book of the Dead)
He also enjoyed
Playing board games
But he can't sink my battleship now
'Cause Dad was killed by
A Candarian demon (Candarian demon, Candarian demon, Candarian demon)
They say love is cruel
And I believe them
My heart's always broken
'Cause the men in my life
Keep getting killed
By Candarian demons
Why?!
I don't know!
Annie, baby
I know it seems bad now
It always does
But I think you're exaggerating a touch, sugarbee
I mean, sure
Your father and fiance were killed by Candarian demons
But that's only two men, isn't it?
I mean, there's no way that all the men in your life
Could've been killed by Candarian demons!
Oh, no?
It was high school (high school)
Senior prom (oh yeah)
Going with my steady, Howie Brown (Howie Brown)
A perfect night (Howie Brown?!)
Like I always dreamed (a little girl's dream)
But when "Stairway to Heaven" began, How was killed by (damn!)
A Candarian demon (Candarian demon, Candarian demon, Candarian demon)
All my college boyfriends and my one-night stands
My male coworkers and platonic gay friends (hey!)
Every date I go on ends in demon bloodshed
And now that I've met you two guys
I know you'll soon be dead
What the f-?
They say love is cruel (shoop-shoo-bop)
And I believe them (shoop-shoo-wa)
My heart's always broken
'Cause the men in my life - and I mean all the men in my life
Every single man
In my life
Keeps getting killed
By Candarian demons (Candarian demons) (ooh)