Wednesday After Next
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Finally, someone let me out of my cage
To flip the fuck out, acquire all this power and rage
Well I've been channeling my energy and counting the days
That I would pull the fucking pin on like a thousand grenades
And blow up, tear apart these fucking haters and critics
Debaters and cynics and anyone who'd say I'm a gimmick
Dump gasoline on what's left of 'em on the pavement and lit it
And then I'll go and fuck their mothers just to say that I did it
A fucking savage, fully rabid, my fur matted
While foaming at the mouth looking for something to attack it
Such a dirty mouth, I'm even cussin' in my ad-libs (You fucking pussy)
So good luck with censoring that shit
On so many drugs, they'll never cleanse me of the toxins
Still there ain't a thing that you could tell me when I'm rockin'
I hear the people talking, saying, "Webby is a problem"
My ears to the street like the belly of a dachshund
So, I know they recognize the comeback kid
Admire all the tireless work and stuff I did
I stayed hungry 'til my fucking stomach touched my ribs
And never gave up, so tell 'em who the fuck I is (It's Chris Webby)
Half brain-dead, but still deadly
My Bic's ready, lighting that fire and twist headies
In that jet-black Chevy, I'ma pass 'em by your lap
Fuck your endgame, there ain't no coming back when I'ma snap
Pulling Tony Stark's chest piece out
Convince the Hulk to let the beast out
To have a fair fight and knock his teeth out
Rip the Winter Soldier's arm right from his freaking shoulder
Then I beat Steve Rogers with it 'til he's in a coma
Listen, even Peter Parker isn't messing with Web
He saw me beat Thor with his own hammer and sever his head
Sneaking up on Doctor Strange while he's meditating
Then I'll kick him so hard in the chakra that his neck is breaking
Tape open Hawkeye's eyelids, expose his iris
To sunshine and ultraviolets 'til he's fully fucking blinded
Hitting Ant-Man and the Wasp with the Raid spray
And turn Rocket to a Davy Crockett hat the same day
I'll do Thanos like Pussy from Sopranos, aim in and shot him
And put bricks in his body bag just so he sank to the bottom
Web's a dangerous problem, ain't no way you could stop him
He's so crazy they watchin' him, tryin' to take him and lock him
In the deepest hole they can find
But I cannot be controlled or confined
I'm set to blow at any moment in time
See, I got no major label to be controlling my rhymes
I say what the fuck I want when I want
Know that I'm rarely often evil (Nah), I'm just awkward people (True)
Shit, I need a bottle of liquor just to talk to people
But when I rap, shit, I'm sicker with it than all these people
Fucking slaughter people, draw and quarter people, every bar is lethal
Mortal Kombat, striking as stealthy as Bobcats
Smoking bomb grass, seven states away, you'll catch a contact
Killing every city that I stop at
With a set longer than a Joe Rogan Experience podcast
Anti-social mogul, staying in my house mostly
I'm cozy, but snap in a second, so don't approach me
Roast me? You know that ain't likely if you know me
Things'll go downhill for you quicker
Than Jonny Moseley (Jonny Moseley)
Newest OG in a game of fakes
Who know nothing 'bout the struggle being faced with hate
Or working for a fucking decade just to claim your place
But I'll wipe out, destroy and erase these snakes
That try to slither in the game, I won't give 'em a chance
I'll cut every fucking branch off these industry plants
Take they watch and they chains and they friggin' advance
Slap 'em in the face tats 'til they pissin' they pants
Yeah, I rose from sediment, dirt stains on my clothes are evidence
Underground monster like dinosaur bone remnants
Evil rap nemesis, higher than riding Pegasus
And got my foes evacuating like Chernobyl residents
Highest verbal caliber, harder body than Graveler
With the heart of a lion in my cardiovascular
I don't catch a body on the mic, I catch a massacre
'Cause it's Wednesday After Next, mark your calendar