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Fell into the Darkness
GoddessTara
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I loved you loud, I loved you clean
I told the truth when it cost me sleep
I wore my heart like it paid the rent
You called that weakness, I called it being human
I stayed too long in a shrinking room
Learned to doubt every move I made
You never hit me, you didn't have to
You just erased me day by day
I kept trying to be softer
You kept sharpening the knife
Funny how quiet damage
Can almost look like love in the right light
So I fell into the darkness
Not to die, but disappear
I had to leave to save what's left
Of the girl I was before you were here
I live hard, I live honest
But I couldn't stay and lose myself
Walking away damn near killed me
Staying would've finished the job myself
You said I was too much, too deep
Too sensitive, too damn aware
But every truth I swallowed whole
Started turning into despair
I don't regret the way I loved
I regret the lies I let feel true
I mistook endurance for loyalty
And pain for something I was supposed to prove
I kept hoping you'd wake up
You kept me half-awake in fear
There's a special kind of loneliness
When someone's close but never really here
So I fell into the darkness
Not to die, but to get free
Sometimes the night is the only place
Where you can finally see
I live hard, I live honest
But I couldn't bleed forever for your peace
Walking away broke my heart
Staying would've erased me completely
I never called you dangerous
Because your hands were clean
But the wreckage lives inside my head
Where your voice still tries to speak
I don't hate you, I hate the version of me
That thought love meant pain
I'm burying it gently now
To something stronger can remain
I fell into the darkness
Like a seed into the ground
You don't see the roots growing
But they're the reason I'm still around
I live hard, I live honest
And I walk away with nothing but my name
If living you was survival
Then I'll wear the night and call it healing
Some exits look like endings
Until the light hits you again
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