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Side-Side-Side Quest
Colm R. McGuinness
Popularity ยท Moderate
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๐ฌ๐ง English ยท Original
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The cold wind's a-fallin' as it throttles the banners and rattles the wagons
The road is a-callin' now, but so are the bottles and all of the flagons
Clearin' out dungeons from here to far horizons
Off into town to claim the bounty as a new day's a' risin'
The gold keeps a-pourin' from the hands of the patrons, the lords and the matrons
The boys are gettin' bored from all the devils they're slayin', the glory they're chasin'
Now far be it from me to not a oblige a question
One of the boys puts it to me that we step outside the quest line
Something of substance
A mission for makin' a name for ourselves
A great deed for greater company
Let's steal all the cheese in the kingdom, me brothers (what?)
Wheel after wheel 'til there's no more in sight (did he say cheese?)
We'll be the talk of the town
See their heads spin around
And the quest line can wait one more night
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The stench is appallin' now, we managed to hold it until we were leavin'
A new deed is callin' out, a magnum opus, a crownin' achievement
Tankards were raisin' as we piled into the tavern
And if there's greatness just beyond our grasp, then boys, let's all be havin' ya
The lads are a-boozin' now, the pub is alive, and up walks a maiden
Liltin' her musings, how I'd buy you a drink, but you're not what I'm chasin'
No tavern in the realm could hold the legends we envisioned
Off to the wild we all rode to search for something wildly different
Something substantial
Something to echo through all of the ages
A feat for eternal legacy
Let's tame all the wolves in the kingdom, me brothers (Why?)
'Cause I have a feelin' there's profit in sight
We'll be the talk of the town (they're eating the cheese)
(Oh bollocks! Never mind) it's back to the quest line tonight
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The lads have all but sobered up
The wolves have all departed
Cut our losses, check the quest board
Now we're back to where we started
There's a job to slay a lich that killed a party of ten, so
Oh, he's dead
What? Yeah, he got, like, ripped apart by a thousand wolves
Was that us? Of course that's fucking us! I told you it was a sick idea
Pub? Yeah, pub
Let's drink all the beers in the kingdom, me brothers
Round after round, 'til there's no more in sight
We'll be the talk of the town
'Til we're all but near-drowned
And the quest line can feck off tonight
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