Dr. Spivey
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Doctor Spivey with a roll of quarters in his hand
Fighting off the bullshit the best he can
Able to sniff out the most complicated scam
Ain't no doctor, he's a natural man
He ain't a ham, do it right
He ain't a ham, do it right
He ain't a ham, do it right
He ain't a ham, do it right, hey!
Seen him walk out of a paper bag
Now his mama turn around and call his dad
Eat raw white love with some chopsticks
Come over to my place and babysit my kids
He ain't a ham, do it right
He ain't a ham, do it right
He ain't a ham, do it right
He ain't a ham, do it right, woo!
Out of control in a nosedive
Gimme the keys, I'm Spivey, I will drive
Not all of you can fit into my ride
I'm Doctor Spivey, I'm the one who decides
He ain't a ham, I'll do it right
He ain't a ham, I'll do it right
He ain't a ham, I'll do it right
He ain't a ham, I'll do it right, hey!
Doctor Spivey with a roll of quarters in his hand
Last I heard, he was in the ground
Roll of quarters, what, that's ten bucks
Now it's some fool with his jaw wide shut
He ain't a ham, do it right
He ain't a ham, do it right
He ain't a ham, do it right
He ain't a ham, do it right, woo!
Here's your bill