Popular! You're gonna be popular! I'll teach you the proper ploys When you talk to boys Little ways to flirt and flounce Ooh! I'll show you what shoes to wear! How to fix your hair! Everything that really counts to be Popular! I'll help you be popular! You'll hang with the right cohorts You'll be good at sports Know the slang you've got to know So let's start 'Cause you've got an awfully long way to go! Don't be offended by my frank analysis Think of it as personality dialysis Now that I've chosen to become a Pal, a sister and advisor There's nobody wiser! Not when it comes to Popular! I know about popular And with an assist from me To be who you'll be Instead of dreary who you were Well, are There's nothing that can stop you From becoming popu-ler... lar La la, la la! We're gonna make you pop-you-lar! When I see depressing creatures With unprepossessing features I remind them on their own behalf To think of Celebrated heads of state Or specially great communicators! Did they have brains or knowledge? Don't make me laugh! They were popular! Please! It's all about popular It's not about aptitude It's the way you're viewed So it's very shrewd to be Very very popular Like me! Why, Miss Elphaba, look at you. You're beautiful! I, I have to go You're welcome And though you protest Your disinterest I know clandestinely You're gonna grin and bear it! Your new found popularity! Aah! La la, la la! You'll be popular! Just not quite as popular as me!

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