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Lonesome Cowboy Burt

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My name is Burtram, I am a redneck All my friends they call me "Burt" (Hi, Burt!) All my family from down in Texas Make their livin' diggin' dirt Come out here to Californy Just to find me some pretty girls Ones I seen gets me so horny Ruby lips and teeth like pearls Wanna love 'em all, wanna love 'em dearly Wanna pretty girl, I'll even pay! I'll buy 'em furs, I'll buy 'em jewelry I know they like me, here's what I say I'm lonesome Cowboy Burt Speakin' atcha Come smell my fringe-y shirt Reekin' atcha My cowboy pants, my cowboy dance My bold advance on this here waitress Yodel-oh-oo-pee-hey Yodel-oh-oo-pee! (He's lonesome Cowboy Burt Don'tcha get his feelings hurt) Come on in this place and I'll buy you a taste You can sit on my face, where's my waitress? Burtram, Burtram redneck Burtram, Burtram redneck I'm an awful nice guy Sweat all day in the sun Roofer by trade, quite a bundle I've made I'm a unionized roofin' old son-of-a-gun (He's a unionized roofin' old son-of-a-gun!) When I get off, I get plastered Drink till I fall on the floor Find me some Communist bastard And stomp on his face till he don't move no more (He stomps on his face till he don't move no more!) I fuss and I cuss and I keep on drinkin' Till my eyes puff up and turn red I drool on my shirt, I see if he's hurt Kick him again in the head (Yes!) Kick him again in the head (Boys!) Kick him again in the head (Now!) (Kick him again in the head!) Lonesome Cowboy Burt Speakin' atcha Come smell my fringe-y shirt Reekin' atcha My cowboy pants, my cowboy dance My bold advance, on this here waitress Yodel-oh-oo-pee-yeh Yodel-oh-oo-pee! (He's lonesome Cowboy Burt Don'tcha get his feelings hurt) Well come on in this place and I'll buy you a taste And you can sit on my face, where's my waitress? Opal you hot little bitch!