The Mud Shark - Live
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The mating call of the adult male Mudshark
Mudshark
Take it away, brother Mark!
Right now we're gonna teach you all a little dance called "The
Mudshark." Now the last time we were here, down this town a
Little ways, we started contrivin' this dance called "The Mudshark
" Tonight we're gonna teach each and every one of you here how
To do "The Mudshark." But before we teach you this dance, I'm
Gonna introduce to you my brother, Frank Zappa. He's gonna tell
Us where the Mudshark, he come from. Good, take it away, Frank!
Before I tell you where the Mudshark came from, I would like to
Introduce the most recent addition to the Mothers of Invention. I'd
Like to introduce the members, the distinguished members of the
Foreign press who have been on tour with the Mothers for a week
And they are gonna actually perform the Mudshark dance. They're right
Over in that area there, and they have the details. They know how to
Do it. So when we give you the instructions on how to do the Mudshark
Dance, just look around. You'll see they'll lead you around the room
You can trust 'em, y'know, they're part of the group and everything
The origins of the Mudshark are as follows (Bring the ban on down
Behind me, boy!): There's a motel in Seattle, Washington. It's
Called the Edgewater Inn. Has anybody ever been to the Edgewater Inn?
Then you know that the Edgewater Inn really exists, and you know
That this Edgewater Inn is located on Pier 67 in Seattle, Washington
That means that when you look out your window, you don't see no dirt
Or nothing, there's a bay or something in your back yard. This will
Enable the ingenious resident to participate in a little angling
During his off-duty hours. Now in the lobby of the aforementioned
Motel, there is a bait and tackle shop. They also sell knick-knacks
Doodads, and other necessary things that the people who like to go
To Seattle and stay in such a motel can really get off on, they're
Real practical. China dogs about like that, they also have a violin
Case that would hold several bottles of whiskey. Cute stuff. But
They also offer to the general public fishing tackle. That means
You can go in there and for a couple of bucks you can buy a piece of
Line and some preserved minnows, some dried shrimp, or if you talk
Kindly to one of the bellboys, you can get a plate of salmon bellies
Now, you take this material up to your room, you open up the window
You stick the stuff on the end of the hook, you dangle it into the
Putrid bay out the back yard, and you wave it around for a few
Minutes in desperate hope that you will be among the lucky few who
Have actually captured the elusive Mudshark, or Dogfish
As it is known in those parts. It's a shark about that
Long, gray and everything with a sandy skin, and it can
Be very useful in conjunction with a young lady who likes
To get reamed and porked with it, you know what I mean?
And this is true, there is a girl in Seattle, Washington, who's
Called the Mudshark Queen. She introduced herself to us after
Our concert there recently. She looks like an enormous Alice Cooper
And she was the one that got it from the Vanilla Fudge with a
Mudshark. Now, in order to commemorate this historic event, this
Landmark in rock & roll history, one of the great things that
Happened during the 60's, we've constructed this bold new dance
For you. Let's Woodstock Nation out, ladies & gentlemen. Follow
The instructions, and as you learn the Woodโ no, as you learn the
Mudstock, just follow right on out the door, because that's gonna
Be the end of the show, y'know what I mean? Here's how you do it
Okay, now I'm gonna teach you this dance called the Mudshark
You gotta do it all the way down Broadway!
Now let me tell you, you gotta stand up, each and every one of
You in this hall tonight, I gotta teach you this dance. And it
Starts with your right hand, your right hand and your right foot
And it won't hurt you!
And you just swim, you know, you swim, it's kinda like
Sly Stone says, you gotta do it together to do anything at
All, y'know what I mean? So get those hands up and swim!
Mudshark
Get 'em up, brother, get 'em up, get 'em up! C'mon, c'mon, right hand!
Mudshark
Swim! Now listen, now we switch to the left hand, and
We swim a little bit. C'mon, get that left hand, c'mon!
Mudshark
Now you can see by the time on the wall, the old clock on the wall
It's a dead fly. Now I'm gonna tell you, now we do it with two
Hands, and we swim, like getting in between some nice warm legs
Y'know what I mean? Yeah, now, now this is the step we want you
All to do together. Now this is just like, this is about as
Close as you can get, like Esalen Institute, you know what I mean?
Ooh, Carnegie love, yeah. Now I'm gonna show you this with my
Brother Howard, and this is called "Spawning, Warren Spawning."
What you do is you latch up, right hand to left hand, in between
The legs, and you kinda hop. And we're gonna ask all of you to
Do this, so watch closely, and forget about what they've taught
You. Really, let's spawn a while nowNow listen to me, everybody
Get in there, come on
Now what we're gonna do
We're gonna go up the aisle
We want you all to join in
There goes some people
Latch on to those people
They're going up the aisle
Follow them
What are those people
They're doing the Mud Shark
Come on
They're doing the Mud Shark
Yeah baby
Brother Mark
Brother Mark is gonna do the Mud Shark
Follow him baby
Do the Mud Shark
Ha!
Now the Mud Shark!
Oh, yeah
Now you're doing the Mud Shark
You're doing the Mud Shark
Wow!
Mud Shark
Wow
Do the Mud Shark
Wow
Do the Mud Shark
Wow
Do the Mud Shark
Do the Mud Shark
Come on, swim with me
Do the Mud Shark
Do the Mud Shark
Do the Mud Shark
Where's my brother Howard?
Where's my brother Howard?
Where's my brother Howard?
Where's my brother Howard?
Do the Mud Shark
Come on
Out
Come on
You go out
Everybody
So far out
Do the Mud Shark
You do the Mud Shark, baby
Out
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