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I Don't Recognize Me
Owen James
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I don't recognize me
ย
I saw my face in a window downtown
Looked like a man I used to know somehow
Same old eyes, same beard on my jaw
But something was missing I couldn't call
I used to laugh without checking the room
I used to dream until it failed me too
Now I count money, I count mistakes
I count the years on my aging face
I didn't lose myself, I still feel strong
But I'm falling apart inside and I'm losing it all
I don't recognize me
I know my name, I know my street
I know my hands, I know my scars
But I don't know who I am anymore
I don't recognize me
ย
I kept the photos but they feel staged
Everybody smiles from another age
That boy believed in simple things
Before life took what hope means
I don't hate this man I've had to become
He made it through what would've buried some
But some days I miss the one I lost
Before surviving had a cost
I didn't lose myself all at once
It happened slow, one piece at a time
I don't recognize me
I know my name, I know my street
I know my hands, I know my scars
But I don't know who I am anymore
I don't recognize me
Mmm, I don't recognize me
ย
Mmm, maybe he's gone, maybe he's not
Maybe he's buried under what I fought
Maybe he hears every word I say
Maybe he's still somewhere in me
ย