Tourniquet
Fox Thoughts
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In spite of everything
I hold my breath for things that I know I can't get
But then the serpents in my head start plaguing me.
They creep into my space
Overstep every boundary
And I know that if it gets to me
It's the end of me
It can strip me down and out of what makes me a man.
Tourniquets around my neck so I can't breathe again.
In a crypt, I am forgotten, insignificant.
But I want me back
And it hurts so bad
I exist as a reflection of my silhouette
Just a ghost a hollow shell of who I could have been
But who I am is not determined by the circumstance
Cause I want me back
And it hurts
But I can't stop
Too sick to understand I'm
Too sick to work shit out on my own
But I don't care
Am I lost or is this happiness?
In spite of everyone
I hold my tongue at the cusp up until I get numb
Or is it cause I'm losing tact inside my head?
If all of me fragments
Will I ever be whole again?
And I know that I'm looking desperate
At the precipice
Off a cliff I dread the slip of craving the cement
Am I missed or am I something you would soon forget?
Would you think of all the things you know I could've been?
Do you want me back?
And it hurts so bad
Could we skip all of the times you had to second guess
My intention was to leave and then wish you the best
Who I am has been determined by the circumstance
Man it got so bad
It hurts
But I can't stop
Too sick to understand I'm
Too sick to work shit out on my own
But I don't care
Am I lost or is this happiness?
Everyday I'm eclipsed in haze
And I don't think I could reach for the light
So I wait here
Am I lost or is this happiness?
Too sick to understand I'm
Too sick work shit out on my own.
But I don't care
Am I lost or is this happiness?
I live forsaken
Inside this coffin
Spent my life carving out this state
I'm now misshapen
With sections caved in
Can I run back
Or is it too late?