This Year For Presidents' Day, I'm Giving Up on Rock and Roll (2006)
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The second attempt at a tour split went slightly better than the Sharx split, as this one actually came out. The plan however was to release it by Christmas, as this song and the last one were clearly Christmas songs. Things started taking too long however, and it eventually was to be released on Presidents' Day (I think it may have even come out a day or two afterwards.) Rick cleverly wrote his political songs to alter the 7" to this timeline. I however, just replaced the word "Christmas" with "Presidents' Day." Not as clever.
I was gonna die alone, I know.
(Gonna die before thirty years old)
I've got this notion that successful careers are evil.
So finally for the holidays
(A gift is coming all y'allz way)
my family will be excited when they look under the Presidents' Day tree
To see a box shrink-wrapped with real gold.
Not paper gold.
It's a fucking box filled to the top
With fucking gold.
Hey, Mom! I got a job I'm not wasting my potential!
Hey, all my friends!
You don't have to hear about blah blah band
who just got a brand new Prevost bus
and forgot my name and used to open for us.
It's getting old, I know.
That's why I'm giving up on rock and roll.
We'll celebrate in my new pad
(I'm flying you out mom and dad!)
I've got a new job and a 40 inch plasma
(We'll watch 24!)
Now without music I can concentrate on sitting down
and charging by the hour to sell ideas to some assholes who wants to sell a car.
I've upgraded from my childhood bedroom
to Southern California
(everyone here's always smiling)
Hey, Dad! I sold the van and used the money to invest!
I'm buying stocks and climbing ladders!
I'm all business!
Yes sir! Right sir! Coming sir!
Your documents are in order!
You're fucking proud. I know.
Thank Bush I've given up on rock and roll.
Hey, Mom! I got a job I'm not wasting my potential!
Hey, all my friends!
You don't have to hear about blah blah band
who just got a brand new Prevost bus
and forgot my name and used to open for us.
It's getting old, I know.
Thank Cheney I've given up on rock and roll.
We'll drink Delirium not Pabst.
Not at my parents'
We're at my brand new apt
(that stands for apartment.)