funeral
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Show up or donโt
Iโm gonna set your plate and I wonโt eat a bite
No Iโll starve
In the dark and alone
Dreaming of sharing your breath
Blowing parliament smoke at the floor
You took a flight to the ocean
And I took a drive with him but it wasnโt right
I tried to hide in the open
But you declined
To even try to find me
Now in everything
And everyone
I scream your name
And imagine what we could have been
Now itโs been a year
And Iโve had enough
If I see you again
Iโm handing you Yellow chrysanthemums
And rosaries,
I want you home with me
I miss you totally
I cry in my tweety pajama pants and
Honestly,
I know youโre haunting me
I thought you wanted me,
I hope I see you at my funeral
Pacing around
Tryna forget your cigarette kisses on the crown of my head
I tried to stay down but
I felt abandoned, beads on your hand in my nightmares
Is it my fault that I wanna move on?
When you told me that Iโm not what you want,
And you came back only for a minute
With a burnt out vape and a dumb explanation.
And I do coke anymore
If I did it would just take me back and remind me.
Of the love that I couldnโt give you
But demanded you give me and now Iโm stuck in
everything
And everyone
I scream your name
And imagine what we could have been
Now itโs been a year
And Iโve had enough
If I see you again
Iโm handing you Yellow chrysanthemums
And rosaries,
I want you home with me
I miss you totally
I cry in my tweety pajama pants and
Honestly,
I know youโre haunting me
I thought you wanted me,
I hope I see you at my funeral