The Story of Flipper
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I was a-sailing for three days, a-headed for England
Just to make a swingin' scene
When my raft got blown up, torpedoed by
An eskimo submarine
I swam for three days, I swam for three nights
I finally rested upon a log
When I bumped head on into a queasy fish
Who was lost upon the fog
I told him my hard-luck story
And of the raft I was the skipper
He says, "Hop aboard, I'm gonna take you to shore
I'm the friendly dolphin flipper"
Well, friendship really threw me
And how it all could be so fine
Every time I thought about it
Nearly blew my mind
It wasn't about three days of travelin' time
We finally made it to the shore
I handed him a five-dollar bill
He replied, "Man, what's this for?"
I said, "I'm awful sorry, man
I wish I could have paid you more"
He said, "That's quite all right, I understand
We fish been underpaid before
I don't need your five-dollar bill, man
And I know just where it's been
Can't you see I'm a fish, man?
I don't need another fin"
Just then I rolled off his back
And I swam three hundred feet to land
When I saw him wiggle about his fin
He did that because he did not have a hand
Well, I was kinda shook at the whole scene
I didn't really know where it was at
But thirty natives was chasin' me
And I did not fancy that
So I ran up the side of a mountain
And I rested beneath a tree
When I woke up, Rip Van Winkle
He smiled and said, "Hi, I'm me"
I asked him where the phone was
And it really was true
He said, "Yes, the phone is just around the corner
It's red, white and blue"
Well, just then he shook my hand
I started runnin' for his life
And I heard him say as he left me
Said he had a nagging wife
Well, I shimmied up the side of a coconut tree
To use the payphone
When I discovered I dialed the wrong number
And my only dime was gone
So I decided it was about time to move on
And I climbed down from the tree
But there were thirty natives and they was down on the bottom
All lookin' up at me
They told me I should come on down
Because they just want to use the phone
And if I came down in a hurry
They were gonna help me find my home
So like a fool I believed them
And I came down from the tree
And really, Saint Peter
That's exactly what happened to me
That's all, man