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Wash Yo' Ass
Martin Lawrence
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I learned a lot, y'all
I gotta tell you, I went through a lot in the last-
I don't know, what has it been?
I don't even know how long I ain't been down
I've been through a lot since Saturday Night Live shit
Since the media went buck-wild on Martin Lawrence
"Martin Lawrence went on fucking Saturday Night Live
Talked about dicks and screwing and washing your ass
How could he do it!"
And I was like, why the fuck did people get mad at that time?
I got calls, "Oh, you're going to be banned from NBC
You can never ever go on TV again"
I'm like, what? 'Cause I talked about washing your ass?
They said, "Well, women got offended
They didn't believe that you said something like that
Why did you do it?"
I said, "Wait a minute, what do you mean what women got offended?"
He said, "Well, women all over the world"
I said, "How are you going to get offended if I tell you to wash your ass?
If I tell you to douche?
No, how would you get offended?
The only ones who would get offended are the ones who don't douche"
I said, "You motherfuckers is crazy"
I said, "I gotta talk, I gotta tell what I feel
I gotta talk about my life as I see it"
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