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building your online brand
Brian David Gilbert
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Throughout recorded history philosophers have queried
Am I a person or am I a brand
Luckily, in our modern world
We no longer need to choose between these two sublime options
But full coordination of your personhood
And your branding can be challenging
And that's why I'm here
To help you turn your humanity into your hu-brand-ity
Hello, I'm Hugh Brandity
Welcome to my seminar entitled "Building Your Online Brand"
A brand is your soul's own work of art
You can never go wrong if you follow your heart
Assuming your heart's obsessed with what is best
And what's best is anything that can give you a following
Your brand can range from simple to obtuse
Do you bake fancy cakes or do you rate hot moose?
It's not incorrect if you expect to always collect views
When you stay on brand
You see, a brand is much like a flower
In that it stinks and it takes its own path
If you think you know how it will grow
Then you've never tasted nature's wrath
Say you mention offhand that you enjoy
Ice cream sandwiches on a hot cruise
Expect some tweets about ice cream sandies
Every time they're in the news
People saying sandies are on sale
I love sandies, too
Sandies in the mail
Made some sandies, Hugh
There is no escaping from the ice cream sandwich din
Everywhere I go
When did it begin?
This pain that I know
Seems it has been shaping from the simplest of things
Didn't give a second thought
And the repercussions came too soon
And that's why you must contemplate
Building a brand by musing in a brand cocoon
Let your brandity brand cocoon slowly accrete
Because your holometabolous is nearly complete
When you venture from here, you'll know no fear
Everything is clear
Your brand is all consuming once its had its premiere
So get ready, you'll soon be so much more
Let's hope your branded existence is not one you abhor
Open your eyes
And arise
Make a stand
And reveal your brand
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