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School Days
Stuart McLean
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Dave walked to school with his son, Sam, every day last week. Dave's
Wife, Morley, who usually takes Sam, was busy in the morning this
Autumn, which meant she had to miss, for the first time ever, the
First giddy days of school. And it would have broken Morley's heart
If she could have seen her husband and her son walking along
The sidewalk hand in hand. And though she might have felt a
Pang of jealousy for the lost intimacy of this early morning
Ritual that has always been hers, if she could have seen them
Walking along together, she would have thought, "I should
Have done this years ago. Sent them off together like this
" Her son's empty backpack, her husband's bulging briefcase
The mornings caught Dave by surprise. On Tuesday, he told Morley
Walking to the schoolyard with his boy was like walking through a
House of mirrors. You bump up against the mirrors of memory in the
Most unexpected places. You're hurrying your child to school and
You turn a corner and look across the street and you see a seven-
Year-old version of yourself standing on the opposite corner. Dave
Grew up in the town of Middle Contrition, not far from Baddeck in
Cape Breton, Nova Scotia, Canada, third planet from the sun, the
Milky Way, the universe, etcetera. And this week, kids in Contrition
Were picked up at their doors and bused to what Dave still thinks of
As the new school, only 25 years old and less than 40 miles out of
Town. When Dave was a boy, he went to school in town. He went to the
Upper Contrition Primary Public School on Sleeman Street, which was
Not only, worse luck, the same school his older sister attended, but
The school where his own mother, in one of the greatest treacheries
That can be perpetrated on a child
Worked as one of the four teachers
And because Dave was Margaret McNeil's son, every year on the first
Day of school he would have to endure what every other kid in the
Upper Contrition Primary Public School still remembers and cherishes
As Miss McNeil's greatest moment. Because every year on the first
Day of school, the entire student body, all 60 of them, was assembled
In the basement lunchroom, and Dave's mother climbed onto one of the
Six picnic tables they kept down there. And to the great amazement
Of the kids in kindergarten who had never seen this before, and to
Everyone else's delight, Miss McNeil would burp the alphabet from A
To Z. Now, many of the kids in kindergarten actually stopped
Breathing when they witnessed this extraordinary feat. Their mothers
Had told them many things about school, but they hadn't told them
About this. This wonderful woman. Some of them were away from their
Mothers for the first time ever, and they would stand there with
Their mouths hanging open and think, "The world is so immense, and I
Have so much to learn." It was a performance that damaged live
Theatre for many of them. "It was good," they would say many years
Later of a play they had just watched. But they would think quietly
To themselves, "Not as good as that morning in September when Miss
McNeil burped the alphabet." Even Gretchen Schevestad, who as an
Adult went on to play in the string section of Symphony Nova Scotia
Had more than once stood squinting into the audience after a concert
Bowing and thinking to herself how much better the concert would
Have been if Miss McNeil could have been there. It was true art
Now, if you were in kindergarten at Upper Contrition Public Primary
School, you didn't see Miss McNeil again for five years, until you
Got to grade five, and then you had her for three years straight
Grade five, grade six, and grade seven. And for three years you got
To take part in the other ritual she is remembered for, the morning
Challenge. Every morning before anyone was allowed in her classroom
Miss McNeil wrote the morning challenge on the blackboard, and when
The bell rang, she expected her students to sit down quietly and
Work on the quiz. And that's what everybody did, because everyone
Knew that whoever scored best on the quiz each day would be let out
Of class 15 minutes early at lunch and got to ride their bike into
Town and buy Miss McNeil a package of Kools. And they got to spend
The seven cents change on penny candy. And it was a ritual that made
The children so happy that even parents who didn't approve of smoking
Didn't think to question it. "We were so free," said Dave to Morley
One night last week. "Nothing was organized. There was a creek
Behind the school. We spent hours catching frogs. God, it was fun."
On her first day of kindergarten, Morley was made to lie down on a
Piece of long brown paper while the teacher traced her outline with
A thick black pencil. And then Morley was given a box of crayons and
Told to colour in the life-sized outline. Morley started with her
Eyes, and she made a mistake right off the bat. She put the first
Eye smack in the centre of her forehead. Now, she knew right away it
Was the kind of mistake you couldn't come back from. So she asked
For another piece of brown paper, and no matter how hard she tried
To explain about the eye in the middle of the forehead, her teacher
Didn't understand. Wouldn't give her another piece of paper. Wouldn't
Let her make a fresh start. Now, instead of turning the paper over
And starting again, Morley went back to her spot on the floor and
Refused to do anything. And at the end of the morning when everyone's
Pictures were put up on the wall, Morley's went up too.With no mouth
No hair, and no clothes, just one huge brown eye staring down from
The middle of her forehead, and her name written at the bottom of the
Paper in big black letters. The portrait glared down at her every day
For a month. "It was humiliating," said Morley. "I mean, to look at
That eye every morning. I felt like
It was watching everything I did."
"That," thought Dave, "is the essence of elementary school. You
Walk around the school yard, up and down the corridors, you sit
At your desk, and wherever you go, there's someone with one great
Big eye in the middle of their forehead, staring down at you."
"We had a fat boy in our class," said Morley. "Did I ever tell you
About Norman? He got along better with the girls than the boys, but
He didn't get picked on, probably because he always had lots of
Money. He would use it to buy penny candy. The year we were in grade
Four, we had Mrs. Merrill, who was strict but nice, and Norman sat
In the middle of the class, and sometimes when Mrs. Merrill was
Writing on the blackboard, and her back was towards the class, and
The room was quiet because everyone was copying what she
Was writing on the board into their exercise books, sometimes
Norman would reach into his desk, and take a handful of
Penny candy, and toss it into the air, and it was like
Someone had lobbed a grenade into the class. One minute, dead
Silence, and the next, bedlam. It was too good to be true."
And when she remembered Norman, and the utter joy of those classroom
Scrambles that he set in motion when he threw the penny candy in the
Air, Morley wanted the same thing for Sam. And that's what led her
Into the schoolyard at 6 a.m. last Monday morning with two rolls of
Quarters, and a roll of dimes and nickels. If she couldn't lob candy
Around a classroom, she could scatter change around her son's
Schoolyard. And Morley imagined that a schoolyard full of coins, like
Pirate's treasure, would create the same joy in her son's memory as
Norman's penny candy did in hers. She scattered $27 in loose change
Around the yard. Under the play structure, and in the sandbox, and by
The tool shed, and under the stairs where the little kids gathered
And she felt wonderful and light and alive as she did it, even though
It was only six in the morning. And it didn't matter, she thought
If Sam got any of the money, although she was planning to head home
As soon as she had finished and do her best to get him to school
Early. But it didn't matter, because schoolyards exist on
Stories as much as real life, and Sam would be part of the
Story, and the story would become a legend, and it would grow
In the telling, and before long it would be hundreds of dollars
They'd talk about the morning when there were hundreds of
Dollars in the schoolyard, and kids would be at school early
For weeks, in the sure knowledge that would happen again
And it did not, of course, work out like that. After she had finished
Morley went for coffee. On her way home, she detoured by the school
To savour the sheer recklessness of what she had done, and there was
Floyd, the school janitor, who was never seen within an inch of the
Schoolyard whenever there was broken glass to be picked up. 6:30 am
Floyd, plowing around the schoolyard like a Zamboni
Sucking up every coin she had dropped. Instead of
Going home and getting her son up as she had intended
Morley went to a phone booth and called her husband
"Why didn't you stop him?" asked Dave. "
Why didn't you tell him it was for the kids?"
"I was too embarrassed," said Morley. "It was too silly
I'm gonna walk to work. The car is parked by the field
Will you pick it up when you take Sam?" And then she hung up
And all morning, Dave imagined, with growing regret, what might
Have happened had Floyd not stumbled upon Morley's money. By
Mid-afternoon, he'd worked himself into such a state that he
Couldn't concentrate. And at three o'clock, he knew what to do
About it. He was gonna finish what his wife had started. But he
Wasn't gonna fill the schoolyard with spare change for Floyd to
Scoop. Dave had a better idea. He was gonna fill it with frogs
"Catching frogs," he said to Morley that night, waving
His arms as he walked around the kitchen, "it's the
Essence of childhood." It had only taken Dave two phone
Calls to find the frogs. "I called a pet store first," he
Said, "but they only had green tree frogs. For, like, pets."
"How much," said Morley, "is a green tree frog?"
"9.99 Each," said Dave. "Fifteen dollars for two."
As she stared at her husband in trepidation, Morley did the math
In her mind. Six frogs, forty-five dollars. Surely he wouldn't
Have spent forty-five dollars on frogs. There wouldn't be more
Than six frogs. But Dave was somewhere else, going too fast to
Notice his wife's growing apprehension. Dave was full steam ahead
"Anyway," he said, "I had a better idea."
"Different idea," said Morley. "You had a different idea."
"Bait store," said Dave
"Bait store?" said Morley
"Leopard frog," said Dave. "The frogs we caught when we were kids."
"When you were a kid," said Morley.Then there was a pause
That stretched into a silence, Morley and Dave in their
Kitchen looking at each other, Dave beaming, proud, a little
Nervous, a lot excited, Morley fearful for what she had created
"How much," said Morley, "are leopard frogs?"
"They're only $6.99 a dozen," said Dave
"And how many are you getting?" said Morley
"Three dozen," said Dave
"Three dozen?" said Morley
"Maybe four?" said Dave
He said it was like a question, like he was asking
Permission, but he wasn't asking permission
Because he had already been to the bait store
He had already bought the frogs
They were out in the garage in five
Large plastic boxes. Ten dozen frogs
A hundred and twenty leopard frogs that
Dave intended to set loose in the morning
Morley might have stopped him then, should have
Stopped him, probably, but he hadn't stopped her
She thought she was being supportive
Neither of them imagined Rebecca Lawrence, five years old
Kindergarten, on the sidewalk in front of the
School clutching her mother's legs, screaming
Loudly enough that she was heard a full block away
"Take me home!" she was crying
Certainly neither of them, Dave nor Morley, imagined Duncan Chapple
Grade seven, would have a Swiss Army knife in his pocket
Or that Mrs. Jenkins, on yard duty that morning, would react with what
Dave later described as hysteria when confronted with a frog head
"If she hadn't fainted," he said glumly to Morley that
Night, "things wouldn't have gotten out of hand."
Even Dave had to admit things had got out of hand
Children running wildly over the yard
Girls chasing boys
Boys chasing girls
Everyone chasing frogs
Rebecca Lawrence providing the unfortunate
Soundtrack for the whole sorry scene
"What sort of idiot," Dave overheard
Rebecca's father say, "could have done this?"
"Out of hand," said an icy Nancy Cassidy, the school
Principal, as Dave sat across her desk the next morning
"It was like a prison riot."
Nancy Cassidy had always struck Dave as a-- as a gentle soul
Now she was speaking to him as if he were a child
"What on earth did you think you were doing?" she demanded
And then, "Perhaps you would consider some form of counselling."
Dave had already spent an hour on his knees with Floyd the
Janitor, scraping frogs off the schoolyard with a putty knife
Surely, he thought, this was enough
Clearly, it was not, and that is why on Monday morning the
Entire school will be gathered in the lunchroom so Dave
Can explain what he was thinking when he brought the frogs
Explain why frogs were such a joyful memory, memories he
Had hoped they would capture as they went about capturing
The frogs, and why it was wrong to remove a frog's head
Th-- this was his idea, to do this, and he is dreading it
But-- but these are the things you do when you love someone
You try so hard to create good times that they will remember and
Cherish, and so often the things you try to do go amiss and you
Spend more time mopping up after yourself than anything else
It always turns out that the things people
Remember are the things that you'd never imagine
Something you'd do without even thinking, and when you--
And when you realize it, you want to say, "I could have
Done that thing so much better because I love you so much
If I had known that that thing was going to please you, I would
Have done it more thoughtfully, more mindfully, more often
If I had only known, I would have done it every day of your life
I would pay so much more attention if I could do it again."
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