Before the Trade
Aven Lysarre
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Stendal's quiet
Brick and trees
Clinic runs with steady pleas
He moves like
Nothing's out of line
White coat, clipboard
Clockwork time
I watch from corners
Glass and shade
Same hands, same voice
Just cleanly laid
I can't knock, I can't wave
Memory isn't something I save
I trace the edges, check the street
This peace was never mine to meet
I want to speak
And say what's true
No silent part
I have to skew
I want a space
That feels like mine
A chat beyond
The mission line
I want to trust
He's still the same
And feel okay
To say my name
He folds a note
Then checks his phone
Laughs aloud once
A peace I've rarely known
I spot the entry
Note the cam
Review each exit
Skirt the scan
No message yet, no subtle code
Just truth played straight
On local roads
He knew me once
Before the trade
Before the silence
Masks I made
One month, two sparks
No plan to stay
I left the night
And took the day
He kissed like someone
Without a role
He knew the name they never stole
I tracked the clinic
Three full days
No tails, no signal
No strange delays
He's not in play
He's not on file
Just a doctor with a steady smile
I draw the line
Then step across
He doesn't flinch, he doesn't gloss
I need to speak
And say what's true
No silent part
I have to skew
I need a space
That feels like home
Reach out and not
Feel so alone
And now I move
The risk is mine
Old sparks still
Hold their line
He says my name
The one I kept
Buried deep
Untouched, unwept
It doesn't trigger
Doesn't scan
Just lives in him
The former man
No past erased, no op disguised
I hold the calm
Unsure it's wise