You Just Don't Do It for Me Friend
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One, two, a-buckle my shoe
Ah, you know I've never really been that good with friends
I won't let you in 'til I can see the end
I don't call back, I'm never late
I talk like I'm fillin' holes or cake
It ain't that I don't like you, you're just better off alone
You just don't wanna get too close to this guy
Ah, he'll pick at you like a-raisins in a pie
If you got regular size feet
And your aftershave smells sweet
Keep your distance boy, it's curlin' up my toes
Ah, like an arthouse movie or a 50 dollar wine
I just miss the point every single time
Now you just don't do it for me friend
And I just don't think I like the way this is gonna end
Did you notice how my eyes looked all around
When the talk turns back to you and how you found
That everything that you hold dear
Your prostate gland and your career
I'm listenin' just don't mess in my good ear
Like pawn shop furniture or arrowroot biscuits
I'm cheap and I'm everywhere and I'm good for five minutes
But you just don't do it for me friend
And I just don't think I like the way this is gonna end
Ah you just don't do it for me friend
I was there back row at an empty show
Yeah, you've dumped your band and you went an' gone solo
You sung so great though some notes hurt
You wiped the floor and you left no dirt
They loved you baby from your high C's
To the pleats right in your skirt
I met your pals and we made some tentative plans
For singin' and drinkin' and buyin' new corduroy pants
Yeah, you're the kick in the pants I just didn't expect
You're the playful strangle around the neck
You sure can do it for me but damn
Ah, you sure can do it for me but damn
Yeah, you know I've never really been that good with friends
But you sure can do it for but damn
Ah you sure can do it for me but damn
Goddamn