Our Diary
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It's Nicky, yeah
I don't know what you heard, you don't know 'bout me
I've been speaking 'bout my life since around '03
That's right around the time when I drank OE
Smoked Newport shorts and a whole lot of tree
God damn, god damn
Came a long way since back then
Lost a whole lot of so called friends
Guess it all worked out for the best, yeah
I don't know, I don't know
Might be the fact that I grew up broke
Or might be the fact that I overdosed on a
Whole lot of stress from a broken home
Smoke a cone and relax
I'm in my zone, so get back
You don't want it with Mack
You don't want it with Kev
You don't want it with us and that's facts, facts
Uh, I don't write raps, I just tell you 'bout my life in the mic
And it's always been like that
I'm the type that gotta fight back
Even when I got jumped in the back by the bike path
I'm just like that
I'm a man and might add that I might've had just one too many nightcaps
On a flight back to the same place where I've been
'Cause I'm lost, where the mic at? (ooh)
Comatose
Too many pills, might've overdosed
Momma said I need to find the holy ghost
'Cause I'm dancing with the devil so, I know he's close
But the fact of the matter is, that it didn't even matter
that I'm packing my bladder with these drugs and these booze
Motherfuckin' all the rules 'cause I'm madder than a hatter
I don't care
What it do? Johnny Mack, John McHugh
Who am I? Who is you? I don't know
What to say, what to do, how to breathe
How to move, not a clue how to go
Got a few in my crew that'll do what they do
'Cause they true to me, bro
But, when you stuck in the snow
Got nowhere to go, ain't nowhere to (ooh)
Yeah
Hey, little Kev, do you mind if we talk for a little bit?
I can see that you busy with your friends
But I'll tell you right now that it's not gonna be infinite
Are you listening?
Somebody get this kid some Ritalin
It's not about the bars like the Partner's or Village Inn's
It's about the hours on the clock being limited
And every moment you'll never get again
Got an immigrant grandmother so innocent
With a heart filled with compassion
She would put the world on her back
if it meant she would take the weight off of the grandkids
All for granted
Would do it every couple months and you know it's not enough
"When you coming back?" she was asking
Next visit in a home that wasn't her own
To a facility from a mansion
Monotone, every single time that I'm on the phone
Mailbox full from all of the voicemails that I'd get every day when my Nana called
See, the fact of the matter is
I wasn't taking advantage of the days that I had
And I ashamed I betrayed them in that way
I'm the only one that I can blame