I'm Not Okay
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Why we all gotta live and then we die?
Why you gotta take a pill just to be alright?
Like how come my whole life it has been a lie?
And I cannot trust a soul since the age of 9
I feel the pressure rising quickly and I might crumble
I know success is bittersweet but I stay humble
I fake a smile and I do it so flawlessly
I'm about to hit another breaking point honestly
'Cause I've been caught up in the numbers and it's detrimental
Go flip a switch 'cause these memories are sentimental
I've been walking through the forest and I'm soul searching
Please God help me out my whole body hurting
Ain't it crazy sit and wonder how the mind works
The only time I am okay is when I smoke purp
Indecisiveness with everything that I do
Am I a prisoner of my past? That's true!
I'm not okay, not okay, there's no escape
I smoke away all my pain to numb my brain
'Cause in my head it be same shit different day
There's nothing left to say, I know I'm better by myself
I know I'm better by myself
Someone get me out this hell
(I'm not okay)
(I'm not okay)
Subtle cues dropped but I do not listen
You love to eavesdrop, I'm minding my business
Rather stay quiet, thinking less hassle
Stuck in shits creek and I got no paddle
Just a pen and a pad from what I write
It's a perfect rendition of my life
Oh I'm sorry you want me, I'm unavailable
I just want to make some art that's relatable
These people think they know me cause they know my first name
I'm staying private if I don't then I'll go insane
Still find it odd how I'm getting paid from my music
But I'm grateful at the same time I can do it
I'm flabbergasted from the amount of people I've influenced
But often overlooked 'cause negativity consuming
Every part of me, forgive me, cause I'm only human
I lack enthusiasm in my head, it's so confusing
Anxiety, anxiety, please go away!
I'm tired of acting and pretending like I am okay
On the rooftops screaming where did I go wrong?!
Everybody leaves shoulda knew it all along
I've embarked on this journey and it's quiet lonely
Been over eight years, man I really miss you, homie
Say a prayer for the loved ones we've lost
Another battle, another day, another war fought
I'm not okay, not okay, there's no escape
I smoke away all my pain to numb my brain
'Cause in my head it be same shit different day
There's nothing left to say, I know I'm better by myself
I know I'm better by myself
Someone get me out this hell
(I'm not okay)