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Opposites
Original Broadway Cast 'Skyscraper'
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Miss Allerton
How about having dinner with me?
Have dinner with you?
I can't even stand talking to you!
What are you so sore about?
I am not sore
Then how about dinner?
Oh, Mr. Steelworker
If you happened to be a Pulitzer Prize winner
I wouldn't have dinner
With you
If you promised that you would bring along
Yule Brinner
I wouldn't have dinner
With you
If you promised to be so proper
You'd make a bishop seem a sinner
I wouldn't have dinner with you
If, Mr. Steelworker
I thought you could be as charming as - let's say
Pernilia Ochis Skinner
I wouldn't have dinner with you
Assuming you were so intelligent
That you made every prominent scientist
Seem like a grade-school beginner
I wouldn't have dinner with you
Mr. Steelworker
If I were shriveling up from malnutrition
And the doctor said I would drop dead
If I didn't eat anything
And I didn't have a friend in the world
Or a penny to my name
And I was too weak to telephone the Salvation Army
And growing thinner and thinner and thinner
I wouldn't have dinner with you!
What I mean is
If a bomb went off
And we were the only two to survive
And you were the last man on earth
The last man alive
I'd find something better to do
I would absolutely positively not
But definitely not have dinner with you!
Well, I'm certainly glad you're not sore
Oh, understand one thing
You and I are as opposite as earth and sky are
Just like December and July are
You and I are
Opposite as ceiling is to floor
Opposite as window is to door
Opposite as charming is (to boar?)
As the perfect pair, au contraire
Our two goals are
As opposite as Greeks from Poles are
As opposite as heels from soles are
Our two goals are
Opposite as any him and her could ever be
But it's a fact, dear
Opposites attract, dear
And it must be so
'Cause I sorta glow when you're opposite me
(Really!)
You and I are
As opposite as wet and dry are
As opposite as low and high are
You and I are
Opposite as sugar is to salt
Opposite as virtue is to fault
Opposite as forward is to (halt!)
(Sunshine is to shade)
Man to maid
To conclude, we
Have definitely got a feud, we
With friendliness are not imbued, we
Not like glued, we
Spare me all your theorems, your stratagems
Please do
To state it tersely
We attract conversely
All I know is we fight so naturally
It's a bit of a stew
Opposite you
Opposite you
Opposite you
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