Walmart (August 5, 2024)
Jesse Welles & Welles World
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I saw a toddler eat a cigarette on a cart of Keystone beer
I was eyeing art supplies, some dude named Tanner called me queer
I do not wanna go
To Walmart today
I saw a woman, stranded, hummin' to the tune of Delta Dawn
On a dead battery scooter with just pajamas on
I do not wanna go
To Walmart today
To Walmart today or tomorrow or the day after that
Don't go misunderstand me for some pinko commie rat
I hold close the belief rising waters raises ships
But was burying the living good ol' Sammy's dyin' wish?
I saw 104-year-old woman bolted to a register, countin' change
Her manager was ten years old with a smartphone for a brain
I saw a family of thirty-three, red-headed, boilin' over
Pick the clearance aisle apart, like some buzzards on the shoulder
I don't wanna go to Walmart today
Or tomorrow, or the day after that
It's a mirage in a desert of bullshit they created that's a fact
I also do believe to the victor goes the prize
But to keep a good man down is just a-something I despise
I saw a serpent in the produce
Hissin', coiled, talkin' smack
He was talkin' about prices
Some shit about rollin' back
I do not wanna go
To Walmart today
This just in
A 5 News Forecast
"Dusting of snow"
I need eggs and bread and milk
Like I need another hole
I do not wanna go
To Walmart today
To Walmart today or tomorrow or the day after that
Don't go misunderstand me for some pinko commie rat
I hold close the belief rising waters raises ships
But was burying the living good ol' Sammy's dyin' wish?
Yeehaw